haiku mondays [俳句月曜日]

2012-01-20T17:52:00.002-05:00

TwentyTwelve

I revisited
this log and was sad to see
no "twenty-1-1"

~s~

who knew?

This blog would still live
six long years? Me? Nostalgic.
Good times, man, good times.

~s~

A New Year

2010-12-28T23:00:00.000-05:00

It's a Fangirl's Life

Is is a bad thing

That the first thing I thought of

was "I met Misha"?

~Jay-R~

The Year on the Hill

Congress gets stuff done.

People don't like it. House flips.

Congress does more stuff.

~Jay-R~

In Memoriam

Written on his grave:

I am now "dead serious."

And still not Shirley.

~Jay-R~

Resolutions

Next year I will write

A novel, lose 10 pounds... and

Meet Misha again.

~Jay-R~

2010, short form

quit job; asia trip;

summer at jew camp;

new job. new place. same love.

~E[dot]S~

2010, long form

quit job. backpacked thru

asia. hair pulled by monkey.

alone, sick, on beach.

summer at jew camp.

someone gets the mumps. hey there,

state health department!

back to DC. found

a new job. found a new place.

and rats move in, too.

~E[dot]S~

resolution

exhale pettiness

and then I breathe in kindness

thanks, yoga teacher.

~E[dot]S~

Say it "Two Thousand Ten"

Now: 2010

Next: 2011

Drunk in the between

~MM~

Christmas and SolsThursday

2010-12-23T11:07:00.000-05:00

Cold Wind Boston Snow

Frozen Car and Christmas Lights

Lets Stay Warm Tonight

~SA~

Parked in a guest spot.

If they have to plow, I'm towed.

No White Christmas, please!

~MM~

Good News and Bad News

If you’re in D.C.

No snow Saturday; but lots

on Sunday. Good luck!

~J~

Christmas and Solsticednesday

2010-12-22T19:13:00.003-05:00

Longest night ever

Makes it harder to awake

Before the sun sets.

~BB~

By stealing Christmas,

The Grinch proved that it was real.

Would that work today?

~BB~

Season’s Meetings

A lame duck session

stuffed with Senate votes makes a

work schedule most fowl.

~J~

Marketing Gold

Wisely rejected

jeweler’s slogan: “Ev’ry kiss

ends with the S.S.”

~J~

Holiday Recipe

Blend one Messiah,

a jolly folk legend, and

Druid trees. Serve chilled.

~J~

Season, Solstice, Eclipse

We sit astride a

speck upon a god; watching

Celestials dance

~J~

Christmas and SolsTuesday

2010-12-21T13:21:00.001-05:00

dilemma of the maji

how many presents

are you s'posed get for a

god in three persons?

~Мир~

How old is too old

To have a Christmas gift list?

28? Guess not.

~MM~

The War on Christmas:

Who the fuck cares if I say

"Happy Holidays"?!?

~MM~

Don't you realize

The holiday season lasts

T-day til New Years?

~MM~

Tiny blue shoes, iPads,

Kindles, X-Box [Kinect]s, Droids.

Christmas in Smurfland.

~JT~

Ice-blue snow shadows

Mirror cool sky above. Steps

Crunch toward a new year.

~JT~

Chop't gave away lunch.

I missed it. Wait! Again today?

Holy freaking crap!

~JT~

Christmas and Solstice

2010-12-20T11:59:00.001-05:00

Secular Christmas

It's decorations

Cookies, presents, snow, carols,

Mostly, family

~K~

Darkest Day

It's unnatural

Waking up before the sun

Here's to brighter days

~K~

Not the Equinox

So is tomorrow

The day on which balanced eggs

Will fall most quickly?

~K~

All year, farmers wake

and work before the sun's up.

Thanks for the food, guys!

~E[dot]S~

My forebears lived in

Ukraine. Awesome summers, but

man, winter blew hard!

~E[dot]S~

Both morning and night,

walking the dog in the dark.

I can't wait for spring!

~E[dot]S~

December should just

be called cookie month, because

that's all that I eat.

~E[dot]S~

For He So Loved the World

Saturday Christmas

Robs us of G*d's greatest gift:

The four-day weekend

~P~

Team Lautner

What I wonder is:

During a lunar eclipse

Do werewolves still "turn"?

~P~

Pomplamoose

Does anyone else

Feel more holiday ads are

Targeting hipsters?

~P~

Song Summar[Tuesda]ys

2010-12-14T20:15:00.001-05:00

Beat It

Pride. Look, I get it...

but you should really leave town

before they kill you.

~J~

Billie Jean

This can go one of

two ways: DNA test or

restraining order.

~J~

Man in the Mirror

As someone else said,

"We ARE the generation

we've been waiting for."

~J~

Bye Bye Bye

It’s a breakup song!

“Prob’ly gonna start a fight”?

Gee, Justin, ya think?

~K~

Genie in a Bottle

I’m a horny teen

It’s confusing to decide

Whether to have sex

~K~

As Long as You Love Me

I could care less ‘bout

Your life, your past, hell, your name!

What matters: LOVE ME.

~K~

Lucky

“This is a story

About a girl named Lucky”

Read: “not” about Brit

~K~

The Hardest Thing

Penis puns aside,

Not boning other women

Can be really tough

~K~

Gett Off

With Prince, "23

positions in a one-night

stand" sounds like a threat.

~J~

I Cannot Lie

I know not what course

others may take, but MY wench

must be rump-tastic!

~J~

B.B.D. Counterpoint

Aye, Sir Knight...though if

she smiles too often, withhold

thy trust from said wench.

~J~

Song Summaries

2010-12-13T10:37:00.000-05:00

Bad Romance

We'd be a sexy,

Drama-filled mess together

Ro-ma, Ro-ma-ma!

~K~

Rolled

Never gonna do

Any number of bad things:

The meme that won't die

~K~

A Pedophile With a Thesaurus

Skintight jeans help me

Be your teenage dream tonight

You ephebophile

~P~

Toast to the Douchebags

Lost in the: World? Woods?

Depends on whether you ask

kanYe or [Iver]

~P~

It's that Dirty Money

Only Puffy Combs

Could coax X-Men raps out of

Justin Timberlake

~P~

I Am a Rock

John Donne had it wrong.

Men exist who are islands,

Of which I am one.

~PM~

This is Why I'm Begging the Question

"I'm hot 'cause I'm fly"

Hypothesis used as proof.

Logically unsound.

~PM~

My Favorite Things

Neither family,

Nor smooches or days with friends.

Rather, rain and geese.

~PM~

Almost Any Eminem Song from ENcore/Relapse/Recovery

I used to rap well

Then I got rich and famous

So I stopped trying.

~MM~

What To Get Someone Who has Everything

(or "Are you really sure this is 'Suitable for children 3 years and older'?")

I'm really hot (Like,

temperature-wise.) Also,

women are objects.

~E[dot]S~

Hey, wanna shack up

in a bright submerged vessel

with some LSD.

~Мир~

Simple Kind of Life

I yearn for a child

Sometimes I "forget" my pill

Wanna get married

~MM~

It's Only Right

To the left to the

Left everything you own in

A box to the left

~Мир~

Fly Me to the Moon

Frank Sinatra makes

Dying of No Oxygen

Sound so Romantic

~Jay+R~

That's Amore

If a pizza pie

Hit my eye, I'd be singing

"That's concussion!"

~Jay+R~

The Requisite Meat Loaf: Paradise by the Dashboard Light, in three parts

•Let's go all the way.

•I demand a pre-nup first!

•Yeah? WEll, screw you too!

~Jay+R~

"I ain't saying she's a

Gold digger," but really,

that's ALL he's saying.

~J~

A Song So Catchy/It Got Stuck in My Head/Just 'Cause I Wrote this

How to make a hit

About whipping hair around:

Say it - Rinse - Repeat

~J~

"The answer, my friend,

is blown' in the wind." Yes,

It's marijuana.

~J~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmbw8OycJrE

You're dead, and that sucks.

I'm alive and I miss you.

Thanks for the diamond.

~J~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8KQmps-Sog

Nothing sticks it to

The Man like selling your song

To a bunch of ads

~J~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf6SLnvqsfI

Not sure if he was

Just nuts or a mob hit man -

He got this stab on

ANY 80's SATURDAY MORNING CARTOON THEME SONG

Explain the stor-yyyyyy!

Introduce the char--acters!

Crescendooooo.....Freeze Frame!

~J~

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Watching you. Judging.

Awake, asleep...whatever.

And don't you DARE cry.

~J~

Baby, It's Cold Outside

Here's the thing Sweetcheeks,

It's snowing and I'm lonely,

so you can't go home.

~J~

Rudoplph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Until someone proves

they have some value to you,

mock them terribly.

~J~

Buttons

Sure, I'll undress

But you can't loosen button

They are binary

~MM~

A Notorious Theorem

As one accrues wealth

One's troubles accumulate

Proportionally

~PM~

Freedursday

2010-12-10T02:59:00.000-05:00

A political

Ink blot or football. What does

Freedom mean to you?

~CC~

On Bedrest

Food and remote? Check.

Computer so I can work

from home? Dammit...check.

~J~

Open to Interpretation

I’ve got a B.A.:

Art Major, English Minor.

Why? No wrong answers :o)

~J~

The Other Side

Social norms, culture,

nature, nurture, destiny...

Freedom’s relative.

~J~

It means writing these

haiku on company time

Without losing pay.

~Jay+R~

I am so damn glad

I don't have to bill my hours.

THAT'S freedom for you!

~Jay+R~

Even for Puppies

"There is no free lunch"

Derives from fin-de-siècle

New Orleans saloons

~P~

Half Dozen of the Other

Idle Hands: either

Jessica Alba feature

or Devil's plaything

~P~

Can be Quite Scary

After finals week

Students feel free to relax

And think of failing

~P~

FreedoMensday

2010-12-08T16:44:00.000-05:00

Value Meal

Whither Freedom Fries?

Rich with nationalism,

saturated fat.

~m~

Don't Tell Mom

Freedom to me is

dessert before dinner and

ice cream for breakfast.

~m~

Chews Wisely

Most sugar-free gum

contains phenylalanine.

Freedom's never free.

~m~

http://bit.ly/eESHAp

You have to admit,

you wish you thought of it too.

Now ain't that some sh**?

~m~

Freeduesday

2010-12-07T20:41:00.000-05:00

Freedom is the thought

"Behind my outward facing

No-one can see me."

~GC~

Less free than a bird

Rather more free than Tibet

Still, slave to money.

~GC~

Freedom

2010-12-06T20:10:00.000-05:00

Friday 5pm

Harsh flourescent lights

Eyes on my computer clock

Freedom is a weekend

~K~

Bophuthatswana

Apartheid era

“Masters of our destiny”

Worth the price, indeed.

~K~

Freedom from Want

Ev’ry year I’m asked

And struggle to compose it

What’s on my wish list?

~K~

Today should be a holiday

Trees and flags have days

But not the end of slav’ry?

Wrong priorities.

~K~

Christmas costs A Lot

"Freedom" comes in many forms

Five-finger discount

~MM~

Broke now, job later

Grad school has another name:

Indentured service

~MM~

Quarter Century -

Now no more pencils or books!

retirement (that's free!)

~JB~

At my desk I sit

Dreaming of the days lost here

New Job? I hope soon

~SA~

***

Thoughts while listening to the Prop 8 Trial

"Freedom to marry."

Well, that sounds swell. Not so much:

"The bonds of marriage."

I'll fight for your right

To marraige, babies, divorce

But first: Are you sure?

Abriged argument

Of the lawyer with gelled hair:

"Haters gotta hate."

~Мир~

***

If You Love Something, Let it Go

Like Golden Shackles,

the weight of choosing weekly

themes has been passed on :o)

~J~

Freedom of Speech

Do I have the right

to shout “Theater!” in the

middle of a fire?

~J~

Grade School Sellout

Never had the guts

to sing, “...the land of the freeeee,

Exceeept for the – slaaaaves”

~J~

What Is Freedom?

Action Born of TRUTH

And a Road Seldom Traveled

by the Multitude

~AI~

"Are you free this weekend?"

Yikes! PacSun schedule:

Friday and Saturday night.

Time to quit, perhaps?

~PM~

Soldiers

Those in uniform

Sacrifice countless freedoms

To ensure us ours

~J~

Open Letter to the Downsized Pundit

The Constitution

shields you from imprisonment,

Not unemployment.

~J~

The Last Oppressed Minority

After too long in

the closet, I'm out and proud:

I write fan fiction!

~Jay+R~

No one to please and

nowhere to be; how I miss

traveling alone.

~E[dot]S~

Thanksgiving ExpereiWednes

2010-12-01T04:35:00.000-05:00

Awkward family time

For an ugly holiday.

The pie is good, though.

~CC~

SOLVING SECONDS (The Win-Win Situation)

When your eyes want more,

But your tummy full says no;

Sleep, and dream of food

~J~

Thanksgiving TuExperiences

2010-12-01T01:36:00.000-05:00

The Great Cranberry Sauce Debate of 2010

Chilled, room temp, who cares?

Guess I'm no foodie, though, 'cause

I love can wibbles!

~KM~

{b}testing 1 2 3{/b}

Sending from my phone

and not sure how to bold words...

There. Did that do it?

~J~

Before Meets After

My specialties are

Beverages and desserts;

Bookends to the meal

~J~

Minimalist Holiday Travel

Up and down the stairs.

Grocery and hardware stores.

A.M. doorbusters.

~J~

3rd Place is Nice Too, Charlie Brown!

Of his holiday

season specials, Thanksgiving's

my least favorite.

~J~

There's No Place Like 5-7-5

I can't tell you how

happy I was to see this

thread in my inbox.

~m~

Locavore?

Is it "local food"

if I switched continents first?

100 miles from what?

~m~

Travel is really opening my eyes to the world and I'm having a great time and the culture here is so magical and I'm applying to grad school for the Fall

To us, Thanksgiving.

But family, friends, and feasts

are universal.

~m~

It Was Passably Pleasant

Next to the pumpkin

we had a papaya pie.

It wasn't as good.

~m~

Sauce Sorry

The cranberry sauce

debate just makes me jealous.

Boysenberry? Yuck.

~m~

But Seriously / They Make the Best Pumpkin Pies / Yay Patriarchy!

Dinner prepared by

Only Wellesley-Women cooks

Seems so regressive

I Could Really Use / Dumbledore's Powerful Wand / (Amiritenudgenudge)

Which is slower: Trains

(Connecticut to DC)

Or Deathly Hallows?

~P~

Answering Irons / Although Your Type was Not Bold / Attempting it Was

Jimi Hendrix's

Take on HTML tags?

Simply — "Bold is love"

~P~

Turkey Day

Highlight of the meal

is stuffing, sauce, potatoes.

Turkey's a speed bump.

~m~

Agreed on turkey.

No plate space for second rate

since I went veggie.

~E[dot]S~

Freshly baked wheat bread,

covered in honey butter...

This is how I roll.

~J~

Thanksgiving Experiences

2010-11-29T10:21:00.000-05:00

The Secret to Mom’s Pumpkin Bread

My cousin asks us

“Why are you guys so obsessed?”

Tons of butter, duh!

~K~

It’s Fine, My Plate’s Still Full

Turkey and gravy?

No thanks, pass the yams and peas!

Veggie Thanksgiving

~K~

Sunday, November 28, 8pm

Ignition turned off

Wall of red brake lights ahead

Traffic: kill me now.

~K~

Eat Eat Eat Eat Drink

Eat Eat Eat Eat Eat Eat Drink

Eat Eat Eat Eat Drink

~MM~

Thanksgiving is fun

But football on Friday rules

My team always wins

~MM~

I weighed one-eighty

Then Thanksgiving came and went

Now I’m one-ninety

~MM~

Rude awakening

First thing on Monday morning

Meeting with my boss

~MM~

My Lunch the Next Day

I Look Forward to the Most

Giant Sandwich, Yum

~S~

Bless you, Kate

I’m honored that my

idea’s taken flight, like a

K.R.P. turkey

~J~

Why the Mac and Cheese Gets Better Every Year

The best recipes

Include a heaping dose of

Improvisation

~J~

Taste to Season

Soooo...cranberry sauce,

Room temperature, right? Not chilled?

C’mon, who’s with me?!

~J~

Done and Done

Monday's lunch heralds

the end of all leftovers -

Perfect "per portions"

~J~

Thanksgiving 2011

Eyes closed, and head bowed,

Holding hands with my wife and

daughter...I give thanks.

~J~

Turkey Grease

Carving the big bird...

(Should I put on an apron?)

on my clean shirt.

~S~

Tradition, Mine

On Poppy’s big chair,

The feast did it’s real job and

I did close my eyes.

~S~

Trifecta, triumvirate, trilogy

Taters, turkey and

sausage stuffing are the best.

Don’t care ‘bout the rest.

~S~

it's been four days, but

food brain lingers: today i

wore clogs to the gym.

~E[dot]S~

it's sad to leave home.

thank god they still serve cookies

on midwest airlines.

~E[dot]S~

come now: ev'ryone

knows the cranberry is served

cold, with can wibbles!

~E[dot]S~

Four Day Weekend

Family, like pie

Is a blessing best enjoyed

In moderation

~Мир~

Meatless Stuffing?

Vegetarians

Ruin stuffing and gravy

For the rest of us

~Мир~

On a Positive Note

Psychologists say

Gratitude makes us happy.

Let's give thanks for thanks.

~Мир~

In Their Defense, sort of...

Fake sausage stuffing

can be really good! Gravy?

I don’t eat gravy.

~J~

Reclaiming the “B” Word (no, the other one)

Friday, unlike most

“Black”-named historical things,

gets positive press

~J~

Family Dining

Home’s where the heart is,

Which explains why Thanksgiving

Often clogs up both

~J~

Post-Thanksgiving Resolution

I will exercise

Tomorrow. Wait, I've got a

Day shift? Never mind.

~Jay-R~

Ode to the Cape Cod Outlet Mall

"Buy one, get two free."

No, that's not a misprint. I'm

Drowning in new boots!

~Jay-R~

Fiber Is for Sissies

Mom's famous stuffing

Has the makeup of concrete.

Yep, I'm sh1++1ing bricks!

~Jay-R~

A Few of My Favorite Things - 3

2009-09-02T07:05:00.000-04:00

I hope you all will

dig this Chinese swine flu vid

As much as I did.

...

Hyperlink did not

work correctly! Here is where

your dreams will come true:

~E[dot]S~

A warm, cloudy day-

a cool breeze, and a fifty-

fifty chance of rain.

~J~

"I can clearly not

choose the wine in front of you..."

I STILL use that line!

~J~

Discovering cash

in laundry pockets; It's like

getting paid for chores.

~J~

A Few of My Favorite Things - 2

2009-09-02T02:10:00.000-04:00

At the register,

Finding out that my items

are on sale this week.

~J~

The start of Autumn...

When the world puts its feet up

after a long day.

~J~

Yes, I’m a grown man,

But a swivel-chair spin still

makes me smile inside :o)

~J~

Crying at weddings,

Jew-y singing and dancing,

Frisbee on Sundays.

~E[Dot]S~

WIN, LOSE, OR DRAW each

afternoon at the office;

my fave appointment.

~E[Dot]S~

Dear Recessions: you

are my favorite bar for

so many reasons.

~E[Dot]S~

Among them: sticky

tablecloths, resemblance to

a hotel lobby.

~E[Dot]S~

Also, who can beat

those King Kong beers and french fries?

Or duct-taped couches?

~E[Dot]S~

MCLUHAN RUINED

Experimenting

With new narrative structures

Form over content:

MUFFINS IN OVENS

What's the best part

About twenty five year olds?

(NOT there are twenty)

SOUNDS LIKE A BORING DREAM

And when I woke up

(The answer may surprise you)

My pillow was gone

UNLESS THEY CAN TALK

One muffin says to

The other muffin, "They can

Legally rent cars."

I SAID, "WHAT ABOUT

"BREAKFAST AT TGIF?"

AND SHE SAID, "I THINK...

"Eateries often

"Treat you like a VIP

"At off-peak hours"

~P~

Blurring the edges

between art and frame, or like

this, title and verse

~J~

And did I mention,

That I really love puzzles?

Keeping that in mind...

Might I be so bold

as to suggest adding “Just”

To the third title?

~J~

This is exactly

The kind of clever wordplay

I meant in round one!

~J~

I TOO WEAR THE MASK

I say "sounds"

By using three syllables

Sow-ün-duz. Deutsch style!

~P~

HIDING FRUSTRATION BEHIND

Good job pointing out

To everyone that's cc'd

How my counting sucks

~P~

CAT EMOTICONS >'_'<

It takes skill to be

Blatantly, aggressively

Passive-Aggressive

~P~

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE,

AND YOUR CUTE GIRLS NAMED ALY

SEATED TO YOUR LEFT

Now I'll sit up front

Under the professor's nose

And thus out of sight.

~P~

With Apologies to Emily

Any worth their salt

look beyond syllables to

meaning and intent.

That said, get it right.

the structure gives guidance to

creativity. And it really bothers me when people don't adhere to the format.

~m~

Liberal arts school

didn't teach me McLuhan.

Am completely lost.

~Мир~

Ok, never mind.

I love Wikipedia.

and the following:

A free beer disguised

as assisting a good deed.

Mike, you have my vote.

Wake up at seven.

Realize it's a Saturday.

Return to pillow.

A cup of coffee,

the news (not too bad) online,

pajamas still on.

Feeling productive

while spending twenty minutes

producing haiku

~Мир~

Eating Crunch Berries.

A moment’s bliss causing a day

Of suffering.

~J~

AMONGST MY FAV THINGS

Sometimes I get so

Enamored with the process

I lose sight of the goal

~J~

IS LETTING THE WORLD KNOW

My apologies,

I meant to applaud you for

Raising the word bar

~J~

HOW SMART I SURE IS

My most recent gaffe

In a lifetime of gaffage.

(Diddy/cheesecake poem)

~J~

THERE ONCE WAS A MAN FROM ALBERT'ER

Marshall McLuhan

Wrote "The medium is the

"Message," long ago.

WHOSE GIVEN NAME WAS HERBERT

For example, this

Haiku conveys a meaning

Aside from its text

HE TAUGHT / AT FORDHAM

We expect something

Out of the five-seven-five

That we don't of prose.

(If I were to write in this manner would you know this is a haiku?)

(JESUITS COULD AFFORD'IM)

Composing haiku

Both constrains our content

And opens our minds

NOW GRAD STUDENTS QUOTE HIM VERB'ER'TIM

Mostly, however

I like name-dropping

So grad school's not wasted

~P~

FEEL FREE TO LOOK FOR OTHER ERRORS

I'd like to point out

Last entry's counting mistake

Before any y'all

~P~

IT'S *NOT* COLIN POWELL SLASH

Type this URL:

Dissertation haiku dot

Wordpress dot com. Laugh.

~P~

A Few of My Favorite Things - 1

2009-08-31T15:46:00.000-04:00

(I used an old list -

If I dropped someone’s email,

please add their name. Thanks!)

~J~

That nice “click” you get

when something locks into place.

So satisfying...

~J~

When my iTunes, set

to play songs randomly, seems

to tell a story

~J~

A game of Scrabble

with creative opponents,

even if I lose.

~J~

God looked on the Earth

And gave us chicken nachos.

Such a loving God.

~J~

Adding [K.T.] 'cause

new friends are my favorite

(I know they're not things).

~m~

When the train pulls in

as I enter the metro,

like I called a cab.

~m~

Order a cheese slice,

the pie's fresh from the oven.

Serendipity

~m~

The "plop" that proves that

no one opened my honest

tea before I did.

~E[dot]S~

Discounts offered to

those who work at non-profits:

yay, cheap theatre!

~E[dot]S~

I second Michael's

feelings on Metro timing;

John's on (veg) nachos.

~E[dot]S~

wrapped presents that wait

under the tree patiently;

anticipation!

~E[dot]S~

Dancing, park picnics,

music, making out, puppies,

"that's what she said" jokes.

~E[dot]S~

PENTAGON CITY MY HOME SWEET YEAH

Living in L'Enfant

I get the best of both worlds:

Orange AND Green Lines!

~P~

DEATH METAL PARROT

Finding a new meme

Before any of her friends

Is a geek's holy grail

~P~

POOR UPPER PENINSULA

Upon meeting folks

From Michigan, I always

Ask, "Where on the hand?"

~P~

What are you doing right now? - 3

2009-08-07T20:21:00.000-04:00

Ready for the Weekend

Staring at the clock
tic, tic, tic...like mouse footsteps
I watch like an owl
~J~

It's already the weekend on the Internet

I'm trying in vain
to find some juicy gossip
on the late John Hughes
~Мир~

Shocked and saddened

John Hughes, how could you
see into my soul yet have
such atrocious hair?
~Мир~

Epilogue

Ill-advised hairdo.
Boring obituary.
The voice of Gen Y.
~Мир~

Office Party

One Friday each month
We celebrate all birthdays.
Diet, I’ll miss you....
~J~

What are you doing right now? - 2

2009-08-04T17:32:00.000-04:00

That Apple was Delicious

Sweet bane of Adam,

If eating thee was a sin

I humbly confess.

~J~

I just bit my tongue!

Eating an apple, no less!

It has betrayed me!

~J~

Count yourself lucky!

You weren't* expelled from Eden,

Just got a tongue wound

~K~

* I consider weren't

To be just one syllable

Disagree? Suck it!

~K~

“Weren’t”? Sure, I’m Southern.

Usually* we stretch words out,

But it works both ways :o)

~J~

What are you doing right now? - 1

2009-08-03T21:21:00.000-04:00

Just like on Facebook -

“What are you doing right now?”

Or “What’s on your mind?”

~J~

Sitting at my desk,

Counting out syllables

Avoiding my job

~J~

It’s my wife’s birthday :o)

I couldn’t get the day off :o(

I’ll be home soon, Love.

~J~

When company A

merges with Company B,

Where does that leave U?

~J~

I lied when I said,

"This will be my last desk here;"

desk change number 3.

~E[dot]S~

Doctors appointments

and grad school applications

leave no time for work.

~E[dot]S~

...which is just as well,

because all I've done today

is curse Adobe.

~E[dot]S~

Or the Starbucks

I'm in New York for

Its idiosyncracies

Like Barnes & Noble

~P~

Just HBO Dance

Bryant Park hosts a

Summer film series

Called "Screen on the Green"

~P~

Times Sq Toys 'R' US

Indoor ferris wheel

Animatronic T-Rex

12-foot Optimus!

An Echo Chamber Made of Mirrors

Rather than pictures

My memories are preserved

Through live iPhaiku

Ah, the Big Apple!

Would you mind bringing me some

cheesecake like Diddy?

~J~

Tyrannosaurus?

Giant, alien robot?

I smell blockbuster!!

~J~

The pungent fragrance

of New York + summer heat...

That AIN’T blockbuster.

~J~

It's five forty six

Instead of finishing work

I am typing this

~K~

Monday: Free cookies!

Also, a day long meeting

Ah, ambivalence...

~K~

Unlike most of you,

My work day’s far from over.

In fact, it’s lunchtime!

~J~

Helpful Hints / News You Can Use

2009-05-26T18:56:00.000-04:00

Fool Me Once

Don’t order sweet tea

late at night from fast food joints -

It’s tea residue

Getting back into the car on a really hot, sunny day

Force the hot air out;

Open windows, blast AC

for a few seconds.

Being Green Tip #1

When you wash small loads,

Do a few, then combine them

and dry all at once.

Secret Ingredient

All drinks taste better

with vanilla; and all foods

taste better with cheese.

With Apologies to ~P~, and Confucius

A boyfriend who’s not

in your area code is

no boyfriend at all.

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 4

2009-04-24T17:29:00.000-04:00

Candy Aisle: The Day After
“80% off"
makes heart, egg, or bat-shaped treats
less ridiculous
~J~

2016
Mere limits alone
might not be enough to stop
Obama’s third term.
~J~

Second Chances
Forgiveness, dear friends,
Is to heal the forgiver
Not he that wronged him.
~J~

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 3

2009-04-23T15:44:00.000-04:00

Some say a fade out
is "leaving the door open."
Well, that's what they think.
~E[dot]S~

If I were able
to do it again, I would
do it all again.

Actually, I
read that on a Starbucks cup.
I really wouldn't.

If I were able
to do it again, I would
turn to piracy.
~Мир~

Do it all again,
Sure I would! Provided I
Had present knowledge.
~S~

If I were a boy
I'd sing in a cross-dressing
Destiny's Child.
~Мир~

The French have a phrase
-- "esprit d'escalier" --
For wanting redos

Some witty retort
We come up with well after
The insult is hurled

Asking yourself if
The cute guy at the show WAS
Just that into you

Emailing "haiku"
Then realizing you're off
By one syllable

Ctrl-Z? Revert??
Life has no reset button
(Let alone save points)

When the "spirit" haunts,
Pull out your neutrona wand
Grab your proton pack

Bust ghosts of the past
With what they hate most of all:
Forging a future.
~P~

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 2

2009-04-22T21:30:00.000-04:00

Musings of a Meat Eater
I don’t understand
catch and release style fishing.
It just seems mean to me.

“Thanks for freeing me!
And the lifetime of flashbacks!
And my new lisp! D*ck.”
~J~

The Doomsday Saga
Is being retold again
This time on Smallville

The comic was first
In killing off Superman
Five new books were born

The cartoon movie
Introduced an evil clone
Who died a hero

I fear that Smallville
Will kill Clark and bring him back
But Chloe will die
~R~

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 1

2009-04-21T16:22:00.000-04:00

Leftovers
Does food in your fridge,
having thought itself spared,
feel you've betrayed it?
OR
Do meals unfinished
rejoice that they may fulfill
their one true purpose?
~J~

Superhero Movies
If the first one is good,
the second will be great, and
the third film will suck.
~J~

Five, Seven, Five...
Haiku is, itself,
a pattern set to repeat
itself, haiku is.
~J~

Spring - 2

2009-03-25T07:45:00.000-04:00

Sprung
Stiff, coiled wire
stores potential energy.
That not what you meant?
~m~

Seedlings (aka Sprung; I Can Work With That)
Coiled...stiff...held hostage.
Then, strives its whole life to touch
He who set it free.
~J~

Schpa-WING!
Most Earth creatures
have defined mating seasons.
Yay Evolution!
~J~

Nostalgia
I still remember
The simple, palpable joy
of a child’s Spring Break.
~J~

Spring - 1

2009-03-24T18:06:00.000-04:00

Ladies and Gentlemen-
Let the flowers grow
and the housecleanings begin...
This week’s topic: Spring.
~J~

Natural High
When it’s in the air,
Apparently, people sneeze,
and/or fall in love.
~J~

Easter
What would Jesus do
If he came face to face with
a marshmallow peep?
~J~

Ode to Moltar
Hear the howling wind
Smell the ozone in the air
Tornado season
~R~

Blades spring to the sky
Bees pollenate the daisies
Time to cut the grass
~R~

In like a lion
The weather then goes crazy
Then out like a lamb
~R~

More Pet Peeves - 4

2009-03-05T22:12:00.000-05:00

You're in the left lane
People are trying to pass
You should move over
~R~

At a four way stop
The rule is first come, first go
You should wait your turn
~R~

When driving at night
and you see lights from others
You should dim your lights
~R~

How much does it cost
To fix your exhaust system
I hate breathing smoke
~R~

Everything But the Amount
Please, make out the check
in the house or in the car...
but NOT in the line.
~J~

Solemates or Laundry Day is a Cruel Mistress
Truly, there must be
a high divorce rate in the
Sock community.
~J~

“Insert Catch Phrase Here”
I haven’t seen it.
Quoting lines randomly won’t
help me get the joke.
~J~

P.S.
Added my friend יְה
with barely any warning.
Welcome to my world :o)
~J~

More Pet Peeves - 3

2009-03-03T16:46:00.000-05:00

If you lose some weight
Your trousers may be too loose
Spell them correctly!
~K~

Transport en commun
Only one of us
Can be walking on my feet
At a time, Madame.
~c~

Conspiracy Theorists
Conspiracy fans
Distract from worthier goals
Poor misguided souls.
~H~

Haters
Giving someone props
Doesn’t dull your own star’s shine
The sky’s full of stars
~H~

Narcissists
All the world’s a stage
But life ain’t a monologue
Others too have scenes
~H~

More Pet Peeves - 2

2009-02-24T18:44:00.000-05:00

Too Damn Catchy
Though I put no ring
on it, it plays in my head
til death does us part.
~J~

Every Couple of Months
I buy nail clippers.
I set them down. I lose them.
I buy nail clippers.
~J~

More Pet Peeves - 1

2009-02-23T08:28:00.000-05:00

I’m Not French
When I tell people
That I’m an artist, they say,
“Ah, an ar-teest, hunh?”
~J~

I’m Not Perfect
Cell phones left on at
the movies...especially
when it’s my cell phone.
~J~

I’m Not Deaf...yet
THAT COMMERCIAL GUY!
YOU KNOW - THE ORANGE-GLO GUY!
STOP YELLING AT ME!!
~J~

Valentimes
Once heart shaped candy
is half off at CVS,
the thought doesn't count.
~m~

Right of Way
Cars in bike lanes are
wholly inconsiderate!
(unless I'm driving)
~m~

Not that Hard
Give grammar its due.
It's just an apostrophe.
It is what it is.
~m~

Guyfromtheparty
If I were [Umphum],
my biggest pet peeve would be,
being called (pause), “Eggs”
~S~

Right of Way Pt. 2
Not a suggestion,
but mandated by the law.
Please use the crosswalk!
~S~

Change I can believe in.
Don’t ask me if I...
Need any change? I sure do.
Your tip comes later.
~S~

MemPhiS
~W~ has moved,
To a new job with the state.
T’was time to move on.

ankle exposure
pants that are too short:
how is it you keep shrinking?
I've owned you 3 years!
~E[dot]S~

it's a simple algorithm
i just can't abide
those who don't 'get' google search.
(mostly my intern.)
~E[dot]S~

"that's how i met my wife"
a wink and a nudge
are not appreciated
when i say "i dance."
~E[dot]S~

get a life
'jenlovesdave@mail':
pairs who share email accounts
deserve what they get.
~E[dot]S~

an argument i can't see both sides of
torn on real issues,
i'm forced to focus my ire
on michael buble.
~E[dot]S~

dear roommates
just match the f*ing
tupperware with the right lid.
it takes 5 seconds.
~E[dot]S~

Old Memes
Irony is not
An excuse to employ your
Borat impression
~P~

Signifying Nothing
Refrain from using
The word "hipster" if you can't
Provide its meaning
~P~

Fever Pitch
Avoid dismissing
Basketball as "just a game"
Lest you end up fouled
~P~

Stupid Logical Weekly Cleaning
Would that it weren’t so,
But the hardest spots to reach
gather the most dust
~J~

False Purse-pective
Who’s wearing what dress
On the red carpet does not
Count as “Breaking News”
~J~

Atmospheric Blindness
Stepping into warmth
from the frigid world outside
Clouds my four-eyed sight
~J~

As Seen on TV - Mōnandæg

2008-12-15T19:40:00.000-05:00

Dear 'Gossip Girl' and/or 'Chuck' Fans
Do not trust Josh Schwartz:
Season 3 of 'The OC'
Broke too many hearts
~P~

Fresh Prince of Taxicab Confessions
[This is] a story
All about how I DROVE from
Philly to Bel-Air?
~P~

Albert Clifford Slater
Breaking the 4th wall
Took Zack out of the TV
And into my heart
~P~

I chuckle aloud
every time I think of
"werewolf bar mitzvah"
~E[dot]S~

get this, ~P~
in fourth grade, Slater
showed up at the local gym:
impromptu field trip!
~E[dot]S~

Flights of Freshness
To squeeze in more laughs,
Will Smith’s plane ride wound up on
the cutting room floor
~J~

I shouldn’t laugh, but....
The expression on
the guy’s face when he slips makes
me LMAO!
~J~

Truth in Advertising
The Magic Bullet
(blender, not that other thing)
actually works!
~J~

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Aoine

2008-12-12T17:03:00.000-05:00

Eminently Practical
St. Patrick and the
Pied Piper- talk about a
perfect partnership!
~J~

According to Odysseus:
“For someone with no
depth perception, that cyclops
aims rocks pretty well!”
~J~

Jiminy Cricket: Failed Moral Compass
Wait...don’t stars have to
fall before getting wished on?
That puppet cheated!!
~J~

Girls Interrupted
Alice, Dorothy....
These days their next fantastic
trip would be rehab.
~J~

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Déardaoin

2008-12-12T02:36:00.000-05:00

Cow jumps over moon
So the cow's a lunatic
Ahhh, mad cow disease
~R~

How do Jews survive
Attacks by Count Dracula
With no crucifix?
~R~

Silver for werewolves
Magic weapons for dragons
Peasants had it rough
~R~

Sam had a demon
Dean had sex with an angel
John is simply dead
~R~

Woman in the shoe
Barely fed and whipped her kids
Sounds like child abuse
~R~

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Céadaoin

2008-12-10T20:40:00.000-05:00

Family Films
Somewhere there's a rule:
No child in a Disney film
should have 2 parents.
~J~

L.R.R.H.
What kind of costume
Did the Big Bad Wolf put on
to trick the Grandma?
~J~

The Moral of the Chocolate Factory
When charming madmen
Show you experimental
candy, don't eat it.
~J~

Kanga & Roo were a Folie à Deux
Did you realize
Winnie the Pooh was stuffed, but
Rabbit was alive?
~P~

The Gemeinschaft is Always Gesellschaft on the Other Side
City/Country mice
Are a false dichotomy—
[What about suburbs?]
~P~

AKA How the Leopard Got His Spots
Kipling's best work was,
"How the Ethiopian
"Was Racially Slurred."
~P~

Men, Women, and Relationships - ♃

2008-12-04T21:39:00.000-05:00

H
Friend, family, wife.
Three distinct ways to love, one
amazing woman.
~J~

Unspoken Wedding Vows
As the world rains down,
we are both umbrellas, and
hold the other high.
~J~

The Secret
No gentle caress
could be as intimate as
simple eye contact.
~J~

Molly Ringwald
Treated unfairly,
she waits just two hours for
redemption at prom.
~Мир~

G-Chat Romance
I gave you my heart.
Then you gave me your last name
next to a green dot.
~Мир~

Office Productivity
Before computers
how did flirting coworkers
send each other links?
~Мир~

Why all the Drama?
Love's really just a
personnel search with a tough
security clearance.
~Мир~

But...
If it weren't for love
our radios would crackle
for lack of pop songs.
~Мир~

Men, Women, and Relationships - ☿

2008-12-03T23:23:00.000-05:00

The "Settling Down" Equation
The point of dating
Is to do it so well, that
you can stop dating.
~J~

"Yes, dear. You're Right Dear..."
It wouldn't be so
Hard to say if it wasn't
so true so often.
~J~

*Disclaimer
Note: The previous
haiku is in no way an
admission of guilt
~J~

Seapration Anxiety
I can not sleep well,
When my Pooh goes out of town.
The bed is empty.
~S~

Separation Anxiety Part 2
Why is she bothered?
"Shawn went away" is just part
Of IM culture.
~S~

Online "Dating"
There's no way to tell,
if the picture she posted
is 20 years old.
~m~

Soul Mates
Waiting for The One
doesn't mean you can't enjoy
the two or the three.
~m~

Old Joke
If it's true that there's
a person for everyone,
they must be busy.
~m~

First statement
There is just no way
I want to get into this
before I am drunk.
~E[dot]S~

I lied; this is my favorite topic.
Love relationships:
The drama is absorbing,
whether good or bad.
~E[dot]S~

From myself, a year ago
Here is my advice:
Do not date anybody.
Anywhere. Ever.
~E[dot]S~

Last night's reprisal
According to my
tearful, broken-hearted friend:
"NEVER fall in love."
~E[dot]S~

Obviously, I am still single
"You have more dates than
anyone I know," she said.
Thanks, Adams Morgan!
~E[dot]S~

What's Your Sign?
Back in the 80's,
people's shirts read "Boy" and "Girl";
It was hard to tell.
~J~

A Night to Remember
I can't recall Prom.
No, I wasn't drunk or high,
I just blocked it out.
~J~

Famous Last Words
"Hey, we need to talk..."
"This isn't what it looks like!"
Anything with "bit*h"
~J~

These are from K
My awesome roommate
deserves to have her haiku
read (judged?) by strangers.
~E[dot]S~

Arriving at Scott's
He shivers in his shorts
We kiss in the doorway and
He pulls me inside
~K~

Unrequited
Sometimes you think that
The one who's perfect for you
Is also a douche.
~K~

My philosophy
Love and playing games
Should refer to sexy roles
Not causing drama
~K~

For E[dot]S
Who can predict the
Vicissitudes of the heart?
So don't give up hope.
~K~

I am forty-six
When I say that I'm single
"So what's wrong with you?"
~R~

Why are the planets
Mars and Venus drawn into
our Earthly dramas?
~R~

We remember 8
6 7 5 3 0 9
But who is Jenny?
~R~

There is no way to
win if she is always right
Just grin and bear it
~R~

Someone once said "There
are no happy endings for
nothing ever ends."
~R~

Politics/In the News - THE Mega-Meta-Haiku Explained

2008-10-23T15:51:00.000-04:00

Quite a display there!
I hope it's not your last, but
the first of many...
~J~

Breaking the Pattern
You have stumped me, sir.
Could I buy a vowel? Or,
maybe phone-a-friend?
~J~

Past, Future, Present
The campaign has bridged all three
As have these haiku
~R~

Thinking Outside the Xbox
Obama's campaign
has started placing their ads
In videogames.
~J~

They're Actually Quite Stressful
Unlike Legoland
or Disney World, "Swing States" aren't
as fun as they sound.
~J~

--------------------------------
A Future Present, Passed to You
See? This is fun, right?
Only took me a year to
Talk you into it :)
~J~

Time management
This is tempting but
I'll haiku more on Monday
Microsoft Excel
~m~

Politics/In the News - THE Mega-Meta-Haiku

2008-10-22T21:20:00.000-04:00

“Spread the Wealth Around”?! NOOOOOOO!
This argument works
Because people won’t believe
Just how broke they are
~J~

Celebrity Endorsements
I couldn’t care less
how each Baldwin votes. Their films
denote poor judgement.
~J~

I think I’ll vote Blue
I live in Alabama
My vote is wasted

Powell and McCain
Each was a career soldier
But one lost his way

How can a tax plan
That is based on borrowing
Get us out of debt?

Experience Test
Why is it Obama fails
But Palin succeeds?

On November 4th
With heads bowed in disbelief
We will watch theft three

If Joe was a plant
To make Obama look bad
Why do we listen?

I’m a Democrat
I have lots of friends who aren’t
But we all suffer

We watched the campaign
At Al Smith’s memorial
We saw John McCain

Biden or Palin,
If the President is killed
Which one would you trust?

The RNC paid
One hundred and fifty K
For hockey Mom clothes?

The Bradley Effect:
Does Obama need to fear?
Are the polls correct?

The new agenda:
Afghanistan and Iraq
Can Bush add Iran?

We are told to fear
Al Queda and Taliban
I still fear the Klan

I have a plan for
the economic crisis
try debtfree.com

Why is it taboo
To tell folks you’re a Muslim
In America?

The Wall Street bail out
Was more a Socialist act
Than “spreading the wealth”

What about ACORN?
What happened to William Ayers?
Let’s try socialist
~R~

Quite a display there!
I hope it’s not your last, but
the first of many...
~J~

Breaking the Pattern
You have stumped me, sir.
Could I buy a vowel? Or,
maybe phone-a-friend?
~J~

Politics/In the News - منگل

2008-10-21T18:15:00.000-04:00

**Action Hero Politics**

Campaigning Machine
Sent from the future
to stop "He who unites them".
The Palinator.
~J~

Lieutenant John McCain
Sure it's not McClane?
He never gives up either!
Yip-kai-yay, mutha---
~J~

There Is No Spoon
McCain let it slip;
The One..."THAT One"...close enough.
Here, have a cookie :)
~J~

Dispatch
On the campaign trail,
first, there's Haiku Monday. Then:
Epic Poem Tuesday
~Мир~

You Mean, Like Colin Powell?
I'd just like to say
That some rational people
Vote Republican
~P~

The Middle Name? Not so Much.
Obama's mom had
An odder first name than he:
She was called "Stanley"
~P~

In An Alternate Reality
Bob Barr stays in the
GOP and becomes king
Of the Elephants
~P~

Directly Quoting André Benjamin
"Why should I vote? It's
"Like choosing which bullet you're
"Gonna get shot by."
~P~

Directly Quoting Theodore Roosevelt OR It Takes a Palin
"Friends[...]I have just been
"Shot, but it takes more than that
"To kill a Bull Moose."
~P~

Obama vs. Palin for Main Street U.S.A.
Whose views are closer
(Alaskans or Hawaiians)
...geographically?
~J~

Politics/In the News - پیر

2008-10-21T01:41:00.000-04:00

This election year -
So much good material...
So few syllables.
~J~

Obama or McCain?
Looks like 2 choices:
You can hope for a change, or
Just hope your guy lives.
~J~

Obama
I like the guy, but
Electing a messiah
is a bad idea.
~J~

McCain
Republicans are
Masters of spin. "Who us?
WHAT eight crappy years?"
~J~

It's hard at work but
I've been missing these haikus.
Here's one to start off.
~m~

Flake Rate
On Sunday morning
electoral politics
are no match for brunch
~m~

The Honorable Miss Alaska
"Caribou Barbie "
Call me "sexist", call me "pig",
But it's still funny!
~S~

Vote Vader '08
Together we all
Can rule the galaxy as
Parents and children
~P~

Vote Kenobi '08
Help me Obi-Wan:
Our most desperate hour?
You're our only hope
~P~

Vote Emperor Palpatine '08
Your feeble skills are
No match for the power of
The Force's Dark Side
~P~

You Don't Need to See Our Voter Identification
R2-D2 and
C-3PO are the droids
You've been waiting for
~P~

Vote Chewbacca '08 ('Cause Droids Don't Pull People's Arms out of their Sockets When They Lose)
I see your point and
Suggest a new strategy:
Let the wookie win
~P~

Identity Crisis
I used to be a
"Real American", then I
left my small town.
~J~

Financial Meltdown
As L.L. might say-
Yo! Don't call it a "bailout",
We'll be screwed for YEARS!
~J~

A Question for Conan
How are things in France?
I hear that your currency
Is still worth something...
~J~

Bailouts/Layoffs
When I crushed the roach
scuttling by, I understood
how Corporate views me.
~JK~

A Dubious Honor
Jack-o-lantern sneer
in place for the debate, he
out-scaries Cheney.
~JK~

Animated McCain
Beet-faced warrior.
His ears become kettle-spouts
Of sound and fury
~J~

Animated Obama
...and cherubim sing.
Cool-blue halo resting on
margins of error.
~J~

Priorities
The market crash makes
racism a luxury
no one can afford
~m~

Party aside
If the average Joe
was informed as the plumber,
we'd be in good shape.
~m~

----

Adding E[dot]S.
I think she'd appreciate,
and she's witty, too.
~m~

thanks for adding me
please be gentle when you judge
this is my first try
~E[dot]S~
...

I call this "Sarah: A Tryptich"

Sarah Palin: 1
mesmerized I gaze
at your hair, its shine and height
cannot look away
~E[dot]S~

Sarah Palin: 2
strange suspicion grows:
you are the only reason
I watched the debate
~E[dot]S~

Sarah Palin: 3
I've never wanted
someone I adore so much
to just disappear
~E[dot]S~

Party's Over...Here (re:Party aside)
For years we've all slept
behind the wheel, chasing the
American Dream.
~J~

----
Welcome E[dot]S-
Ms. Palin would be honored,
betcha by golly!
~J~

Homage to "Undecided Voter"
You're not sure? Are you,
As we understand the term,
A sensate being?
~JK~

Famous Quotes

2008-09-12T17:09:00.000-04:00

You Tell ‘Em!
Whitney Houston said:
"First of all, we don't do crack!
"Crack's for poor people!"
~J~

Political Support
The Governator,
When asked about McCain's health -
"It's not a tooma!"
~J~

Nelly Logic
"It's getting' hot in
here, so take off all your clothes!"
Sounds reasonable.
~J~

Regular Schedules / The Daily Grind

2008-03-23T07:06:00.000-04:00

My Money's Worth
Once I've brushed my teeth,
I might delay breakfast for
maximum value.
~J~

Leap Year
After 4 years, the
Gregorian calendar
gives us our change back.
~J~

The Future is Now
Our DVR
Makes the concept of "Prime Time"
quaint and obsolete.
~J~

My First Job
Nobody told me
that your lunch hour
includes travel time
~J~

Payday
On Friday at three
The check is in my mailbox
Remuneration
~m~

Sign of the Times
The phrase "like clockwork"
is meaningless now that our
clocks are digital.
~m~

Ides of April
While both are certain,
at least with taxes you know
when you have to pay.
~m~

Travel Time
You mean all this time
Lunch started when I left work?
That's preposterous!
~S~

New Job Blues
I've gotten used to
The monotony and grind
Of the job I have.
~S~

My Time
Standing at the stove
Listening to NPR
Cooking, relaxing
~S~

Media Wh*re
Watching Japanese
Movies, DVDs, TV,
Much better than sleep.
~S~

Pet Peeve #37
To be considered
"a season", a show needs more
than 10 episodes.
~J~

TGIF
Weekends were "Free" Time.
Now it's "Stuff I Couldn't Do
During the Week" time.
~J~

Tearier Relativity
When you're six years old,
a 5-minute time out seems
like eternity.
~J~

Moment of Silence
Let us pause, dear friends.
Philip will be taking a
haiku hiatus...
~J~

RE: Haiku Hiatus
"I've grown accustomed
To his emoticons," sang
Professor Higgins.
~Мир~

My Brother Has to Work on His Birthday
No birthday time off.
Age may come before beauty,
But duty trumps age.
~J~

Fantasy Island Itinerary
“Dear guests, please resolve
your lifelong issues before
the next guests arrive.”
~J~

Date Night
My true love and I
spent 10 long years not dating.
Pick you up at 8.
~J~

Direct Deposit
It’s like the love child
of the banking industry
and the Tooth Fairy.
~J~

Ethnic Combover
As my bald spot grows,
my monthly dreadlock-trimming
grows more infrequent.
~J~

Never Be Late Again
Why can’t subways be
built more like roller coasters?
Commuting!! Wooo-HOOOO!!!
~J~

Fiscally Fit
Subtle protection.
Like hushed wars of white blood cells...
Bills on autopay.
~J~

My 5-year-old Self Thought I’d Be Rich by Now
A great plan, but the
millionaire mountain-climber
market went under.
~J~

Software Evolution Theory
I guess I fear change.
I decline the free updates.
Remind me later.
~J~

Joint Custody in Hell
Every two weeks,
Damien spends the weekend
with his dad. Awk-waarrd.
~J~

The Zen of Marriage and Meals

Culinary wants

are tempered by compromise:

Burger meets Gouda.

~H~

Martha Stewart Ain't Got Nothing on My Mama

Mom raised nine children

Ensures hundreds more are schooled

And she bakes from scratch.

~H~

"Clean House", Curing OCD One Episode at a Time

There's a perverse joy

In seeing filthy dwellings

Purged through comedy

~H~

Scary Things - ホワイトデ

2008-03-14T20:45:00.000-04:00

Why My Phone Calls are Short and Dull
Big Brother listens,
But I’m not obligated
To entertain him.
~J~

Your Nerd is Showing
That look...when sci-fi
comments have to be explained:
Pity meets blank stare...
~J~

Blasé About Pascal's Wager
Can Mormons' G-d "Play
"Dice with the universe" well
If he can't gamble?
~P~

Dadaedalus
Where's the line between
Being a nonconformist
And nonfunctional?
~P~

Gateway "Fug"
Bowdlerization
Might desensitize me to
Real profanity
~P~

A World Without Wikipedia
I would only “get”
about half of P’s haikus...
Plus be more dumber.
~J~

A World Without Google
Like they said in school,
“The only stupid query
is one you don’t ask.”
~J~

A World Without Ebay
Where else would I find
all the crap I once had the
good sense to throw out?
~J~

Drivers On Cell Phones
You can use your phone
to take nice photos of the
accident you caused.
~J~

Sho’Nuff: The Shogun of Harlem
Kung fu gangleader.
One scary mo-fo, thanks to
the Glow...(and Soul Glo).
~J~

Medieval Dragons
They breathed fire, right?
Do you think they cooked things
while they were eating them?
~J~

Real Life Stuff
Your first house...first child...
saying “I do.” All those things
that mean you’ve grown up.
~J~

Scary Things - Jerdrein

2008-03-13T20:16:00.000-04:00

Going to the Doctor
Not going (because
we fear hearing bad news) makes
bad news more likely.
~J~

They’re All Around You
People who believe
W’s presidency
hasn’t been so bad.
~J~

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton’s fame;
Simply because I fear what
I don’t understand.
~J~

Scary Things - Jecrean

2008-03-12T20:09:00.000-04:00

Dreamcatcher-22
Leaving the office
I fear both missing emails
And receiving none
~P~

Education Secretary
Misspellings haunt me
Long after the reader has
Forgotten my words
~P~

Siege Oedipus
I'm perilously
Close to calling most female
Authorities, "Mom."
~P~

'Guns' are the New 'Bully'
How safe are the schools?
In my day we played and learned.
Biggest fear? Bully.
~S~

Job Insecurity
being caught sneaking
back from a very long lunch.
will they notice me?
~S~

I Was Trippin'
A once affected
Employment of slang is now
Natural to me
~P~

The Reality of the Situation Comedy
I don't watch 'Idol'
Not because I won't like it
But because I will
~P~

(._.)
My sincerity
Is confused for sarcasm
Even with smileys
~P~

Alone at Night
The child in his bed.
Shadows shift in the corner.
Parents sound asleep.
~J~

Dietary Supplements
You have centipedes
and cats...recipe for a
self-solving problem.
~J~

Sidewalk Dangers
Inside my pocket,
I grip my keys extra tight
crossing over grates.
~J~

Calls from Family
I live far from them.
Each call, a part of me fears,
harbors tragedy.
~J~

Coming Out
I suppose it's time
to conquer my senseless fear
of emailed haiku.
~Мир~

Adolescent Intuition
In high school I feared
not getting the answer wrong,
but getting it right.
~Мир~

Stairs Are Not For Excercise
An elevator
is a small, sealed, empty room
supported by string.
~Мир~

Superpowers
Did you ever play
the icebreaker where you choose
to fly or to hide?
~Мир~

True Confessions (JK and Мир)
Welcome, and thank you.
I was beginning to fear
no new folks would write.
~J~

Identity Theft
I cross out numbers
Before shredding documents.
And I'm still not safe.
~J~

Falling in Love (Resistance is Futile)
In truth, commitment
is like falling; once you land
It’s kinda comfy.
~J~

Global Warming (Pollution/Toxic Waste/Blah-Blah-Blah...)
It used to scare me.
Now I just recycle more
and hope for the best.
~J~

Scary Things - Jemayrt

2008-03-11T20:55:00.000-04:00

In Tandem (The Plug!)
This week's sketch battle.
Put pencil to paper...twice,
And draw "Scary Things."
~S~

Drawing isn't scary (SHAMELESS!)
"draw...please draw," I ask.
Be creative here and there.
Talent not needed.
~S~

Arachnids
Eight-legged animals
[Inherently] creep us out
(Yes, even Sleipnir)
~P~

Clowns
You know they are not
Really that happy: an all
Too familiar lie
~P~

Babies
Able to command
Our hearts, but not their own
Gastrointestine[‡]
~P~

[‡] OR Poetic Learner's Permit
When I make up words
I worry people think I
Don't know they are fake
~P~

Because I Can't Sleep When Centipedes Roam the Molding, and I Have Cats
Aqua Net is a
useful substitute when Raid
isn't an option.
~JK~

Scary Things - Jelune

2008-03-10T16:43:00.000-04:00

Real or imagined,
Some stuff freaks you the hell out.
That's this week's topic.
~J~

The Unknown
The final frontier...
The undiscovered country...
Odd-numbered "Trek" films...
~J~

Studies Have Shown...
Most fear death less than
public speaking. From the grave:
"Whew! Dodged that bullet!"
~J~

Blind Date Surprise
(Disclaimer: Views expressed in the haiku below do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the management.)
Is she pretty? Check.
Great personality? Check!
Three kids? Wow...Check please!
~J~

The Low-Hanging Fruit
As Roosevelt said,
"The only thing we have to
fear, is fear itself"
~J~

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Aoine

2008-03-07T21:20:00.000-05:00

What's Not to Love? (An Ode to JI and PB)
They cover the news,
Write trenchant haikus, and are
Kind to nut-case Jews.
~JK~

Ain't Talkin' Tiddlywinks
Don't hate the player:
Hate the game (just dislike the
Player for playing).
~P~

Inanmiation
When you love something
Don't set it "free;" nobody
Enjoys rejection
~P~

Apollo 13
Jim Lovell's highest
Civilian honor: Having
Been played by Tom Hanks.
~P~

Loveline
It's a shame that Drew
Pinsky is less famous than
Adam Carolla
~P~

Movie Review
We watched Black Snake Moan.
Does ‘Skanky girls need love too’
count as a moral?
~J~

James Todd Smith
Ladies Love Cool James;
Few rappers’ aliases
are whole sentences.
~J~

A Rasta Once Told Me....
“Don’t appreci-ate,
appreci-love!” Don’t blame me
cause you ‘ate h’s.
~J~

If Bush Had His Way
Gynecologists
Could “practice their love” freely
across the country.
~J~

Bridge to Terabithia
Beloved childhood tomes
Made into flashy movies
Often let me down
~H~

Lift every voice and sing
Black History month’s
anthem always sounds dreary
Folks, sing it with love!
~H~

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Déardaoin

2008-03-06T17:55:00.000-05:00

Tragically Delicious
I want to lose weight -
Unfortunately, CakeLove
is on the way home.
~J~

Minnie Ripperton’s “Loving You”
I keep trying to
make a haiku with this song...
but I got nuthin’.
~J~

Tin Roof...rusted
Stipe says the Love Shack
line doesn’t mean “She’s pregnant”.
Urban myth...busted.
~J~

20 Years Later, It’s Still Funny
Mouse A mugs Mouse B -
“Give that back! That’s NACHO cheese!”
HA! I love that joke!
~J~

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Chéadaoin

2008-03-05T21:22:00.000-05:00

Better than a Boat
Let’s start a Love Train,
people all over the world!
Let’s wash our hands first!
~J~

Red, White, Black, Brown or Green (or Why do people assume their ignorance is shared?)
Don’t assume I hate.
Racist comments have no place
In my inbox. (f**k!)
~S~

How Heavy a Haiku? (Lovely...)
Mostly just for fun,
But sometimes my poetry
Becomes a soapbox.
~S~

Bring the Heavy
All weights are welcome.
I’d love for this to become
truly expressive.
~J~

Method to my Madness
Part of the reason
I chose the “Love/Hate” topic
was to help do that
~J~

The Root of Ignorant Hate
Where does it come from?
Poor self-esteem is my guess,
Haters: Try Yoga!
~S~

the bridge between hate and love
On a lighter note,
I present the following
Three lines of haiku:

More Milkshake (The Lowbrow)
Just which body part,
Brings all the boys to the yard?
I’d sure love to know!
~S~

Natural High
There exists nowhere
a more powerful tonic
than a lover’s smile.
~J~

Grammar by Blige
Conjugation was
redefined when Mary J.
coined “hateration”
~J~

Isosceles
Looking up, he saw
his true love through the window,
in her true love’s arms
~J~

Love and Hate Personified
Radio Raheem
wore his heart not on his sleeve,
but on his knuckles.
~J~

AAVEtymology
I am pretty sure
"Hateration" derived from
The pun "Haterade."

Keep in mind that "hate"
— In this sense — is more about
Envy than contempt

"Haters" pull down their
Peers like the proverbial
Crabs In a barrel

While a "hater" can
"Come at" their betters, they are
Nothing to a boss
~P~

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Mháirt

2008-03-04T19:47:00.001-05:00

Put Another Way
The only rule is
‘love’ or ‘hate’ (or some version)
must appear each time.
~J~

Once More, with Feeling
I hate deja vu.
I feel like fate’s reminding
me that I am its b****
~J~

My Application to Harvard
Question: What do you
do in your spare time? I wrote
“Hate on rich people.”
~J~

The Actual Poem is Kinda Raunchy
“I think that I shall
Never see a poem as
Lovely as a tree...”
~J~

Milkshake Meme
Sing There Will Be Blood
To the tune of Maroon 5's
Hit, "She Will Be Loved."
~P~

Yoda Koa[n]
Fear leads to anger;
Anger leads to hate; hate leads
To Meet the Spartans.
~P~

Poor AIM
Once I finally
Saw Annie Hall, the word "lurve"
Ceased being funny
~P~

"Miss Nancy" and "Aunt Fancy" OR A Haiku Not About A Movie
Avuncular love
Made Harriet Lane the best
Of all First Ladies
~P~

Awards and Accolades - Dydd Gwener

2008-02-29T17:01:00.000-05:00

Linkin Park > Outkast?
Hybrid Theory
Is the best-selling album
Of this century
~P~

Johannesburg's Own Steve Nash
The best basketball
Player born in Africa
Is Canadian
~P~

Bogus Award
“World’s Best Mom?” “Best Dad”?
But that shelf’s FULL of mugs! What’s
your criteria?
~J~

Grammy Nominee – Worst Battle Rap
“I have scads more things
than you. Nice things...and money...
And I date a lot.”
~J~

Denied the Gold
I was dodgeball king.
Then I grew up and found out
it wasn’t a sport.
~J~

Most Optimistic – Charlie Brown
Optimism? Nah.
Repeated head trauma has
impaired his judgement.
~J~

Awards and Accolades - Dydd Llun

2008-02-25T20:40:00.000-05:00

Achievements
X-Box Achievements:
Triumphs you don’t know you want
until you get them.
~J~

There Will Be Blood
Cold, calculating
crazy folks have a real knack
for winning Oscars.
~J~

Pretty Pictures - جمعھ

2008-02-23T10:40:00.000-05:00

This Week’s Silence
My words aren’t flowing,
But the ink from my pen is.
Drawing. No haiku.
~S~

Touch and Go
The touch of the pen,
On paper facinates me.
Light lines thick lines.
~S~

Chirality is Dead
A Möbius strip
Is as close as we'll get to
Escher in real life
~P~

1982 Pontiac Trans Am OR The Non-OnStar Talking Car
The eighties' future -
Knight Industries Two Thousand -
Is unrealized.
~P~

This Week’s Silence - Response
I feel you, brother.
Art, like all calls from within,
cannot be ignored.
~J~

Website in the Works
Very soon, the phrase
“Never Take a Bear’s Ballon”
will make sense to you...
~J~

Sword
The pen on paper,
Creating pictures or words,
Mightier than the...
~S~

Mighty Mouse
Viewing many fast,
Static pictures can move.
Cartoons are magic
~S~

The Very Old Testament
For centuries, the
“Greatest Story Ever Told”
was told through pictures.
~J~

Magazine Covers
Tyra fights to keep
stars off the land conquered by
the supermodel.
~J~

Interactive Storytelling
Before online play,
Nintendo, or even Pong,
there were pop-up books.
~J~

Pretty Pictures - جمعرات

2008-02-21T19:41:00.000-05:00

Not to be Confused with Unipegs
Mate a unicorn
With Pegasus and you get
♥Pretty pegacorns♥
~P~

Like Goofy Walking Pluto
Charmmy Kitty is
Hello Kitty's "pet" persian.
Straight up slavery.
~P~

We Major (in Political Philosophy) OR Concupiscence Offset Trading OR Kanye's Conundrum OR I Liked The Lyrics Challenge
Are "strip clubs cool if
"My tips helped send a pretty
"Girl through school?" Doubtful.
~P~

In Theaters Now
Giant 3-D heads
of Bono and the Edge for
Two hours? I’ll pass.
~J~

Pitchfork Trivia
The couple in Wood’s
“American Gothic” are
brother and sister.
~J~

The Artist
Mindscape awash with
truths beyond color and form.
Stay inside the lines.
~J~

Paraphrased Headline from The Onion:
“Michael Bay Uses
CG to Build ‘Best Actor’
Award for Himself”
~J~

Pretty Pictures - منگل

2008-02-19T15:20:00.000-05:00

Sistine Chapel
Michelangelo
created a masterpiece:
Creation's Master.
~J~

“Christina’s World”
When I saw Wyeth,
I knew I was destined to
become an artist.
~J~

Not My Style
“Ed, Edd, and Eddy”
is one cartoon I can’t watch...
Those kids just look gross.
~J~

Strike a Pose
Paparazzi thrives
because we blend our hating
with hero-worship.
~J~

Lyrics - Iovis

2008-02-14T19:59:00.000-05:00

Roses=International Players' Anthem
Big Boi seeks one thing:
"I want to see your support
"Bra, not support you."
~P~

I Love You Like a Fat Kid Loves Cake
"You know my style, I'll
"Say anything to make you
"Smile." ~ Curtis Jackson
~P~

Killing Me Softly (L. Boogie Version)
"Strummng my pain with
"His fingers (One time!) Singing
"My life with his words."
~P~

Whatever Happened to...
“Where in the world is
Carmen Sandiego”...and
where’s Rockapella?
~J~

Friends ‘Til the End
2Pac and D.U.
Hooked up on “I Get Around”.
Hip Hop Reunion.
~J~

Anya’s Theory
“What do they need such
Good eyesight for anyway?!
IT MUST BE BUNNIES!!”
~J~

The Pot Calling the Kettle Black-Eyed Peas
“Hip Hop is Dead” (Nas)
featured the Peas’ Will.I.Am.
Now that’s irony...
~J~

Buffy’s Problem
“Why can’t I feel? My
Skin should crack and pe-el, I
Want the fire back...”
~J~

Tara’s Problem
“I’m under your spell,
Willow, can’t you see, there’ll be
nothing left of me...”
~J~

Dawn’s Problem
“Does anybody
even notice? Does any-
one even care...” - YOINK!
~J~

Lyrics - Mercurii

2008-02-13T17:21:00.000-05:00

2 Live Crude
Luke’s “Me So Ho***y”
went to the Supreme Court...tame,
by today’s standards.
~J~

Wonka-licious
The Candy Man can...
He sprinkles it with love and
Makes the world taste good :o)
~J~

The Tao of Hokey Pokey
Equal opposites..
and then we come full circle.
What it’s all about.
~J~

Lyrics - Martis

2008-02-12T18:44:00.000-05:00

Praise High Heaven
Yusef: "A scale of
"One to ten cannot appraise
"A fly eleven"
~P~

Did You Really Listen to the 'Spider-Man 3' Soundtrack?
"Beautiful ponies
"So beautiful they will kill
"Us all" - Black Mountain
~P~

Nas Liked 'The Hulk' TV Show
"Keep it green like the
"Other side of Bill Bixby"
Means "to have money."
~P~

The Song Remains the Same
The lyrics may change,
But Elmo sings all his songs
like they’re “Jingle Bells”.
~J~

Black Sheep-Haiku Crossover
“You can get with this,
Or you can get with that...” *Check
out two weeks ago.
~J~

Little Shop of Horrors
“Cause I’m a den-tist,
And a success! Say “ah!” (“Ah!”)
Say “AH!” (“AH!!!”) Now SPIT!!!
~J~

(I really wanted
To fit in Miley Cyrus
But she's too complex)
~P~

A Face Without "Freckles" Is
"Like a sky without
"Stars. Why waste a second not
"Loving who you are?"
~P~

"Overnight Celebrity" - Annotated
'Dre said, "I hope that
"You are the one. If not, you
Are the prototype."
~P~

"Hey Julie," I swear
"It's so hard to bear...
"And I'd never make it through
"Without you around."
~P~

[Un]Safety Dance
A Crocodile Mile:
"You run, you slide, you hit the
"Bump and take a dive."
~P~

Why I Walked 500 Miles
Just to be-the-man-
Who-walked-a-thou-sand-miles-to-
Fall-down-at-your-door
~J~

Sharing American Culture with Yugoslavian Girls
Yeah, I liked D.U.,
I sang Humptey in Russia.
I knew all the words.
~S~

Shock G
Humptey’s nose was “big,
Like a pickle” yet still got
Lovin’ from the ladies
~S~

Gangsta Rapper’s Origins (aka What!?!?!)
“I never clown a’
‘round when I hang around with
The Underground.” Say...
~S~

Dan Akroyd/2Pac Mashup
“It’s the same old song,”
One and a half hit wonder.
“All around the world.”
~S~

Lyrics - Lunae

2008-02-11T17:51:00.000-05:00

Original Mashup
“She told me to walk
This way.” Rockers and rappers
Get the best of both!
~S~

"Ink of ... scholar ... worth
more than ... blood of a martyr,"
Lupe's righteous cry.
~N~

Party Life
"Art with no easel,
"Please: there's no equal;" Hov's best
Since Blueprint's sequel.
~P~

Catch You on the Pharcyde
"...She goes again: the
"Dopest Ethiopian
"Keeps passing me by"
~P~

Mortal Kombat
Lil' Wayne asks that you
"Peep the shoe game; all [his] kicks
"Are fly like Liu Kang."
~P~

Rolling with Jungle Love
“Oh-La Oh-La, Aayy”
was Kid N’ Play. The Time said
“O-wee, O-wee, O!”
~J~

All That Glitters
“The Glamorous Life -
without love, it ain’t much,” quoth
The divine Ms. E.
~J~

What’s in a Name?
“My name is Prince – and
I am FUNKY!” Though later,
His name wasn’t Prince.
~J~

OR

“My name is Prince – and
I am FUNKY!” As opposed
to Will “Fresh Prince” Smith.
~J~

Follow the Bouncing Ball

2008-02-06T15:18:00.000-05:00

Altitude
People may call it
“getting high” because of the
effects on climbers
~J~

Amplitude (no air in space)
The sound effects of
dogfights in the “Star Wars” films
are a bogus force
~J~

Magnitude
For Eric Lensherr
Attractiveness has more force
than for most of people
~J~

Haiku for Villains—In the Interest of Equal Time

2008-01-31T19:08:00.000-05:00

For that Colossus of Scholarship (Shout Out [Sorbiquet])
Cecil Rhodes was an
Anglophile of the worst kind:
Mirror-Mugabe
~P~

Multinational Corporations (Shout Out Amanda [Diva])
40 MNCs
On my block; the new Wal-Mart
Makes for 41
~P~

Hamburglar (Shout Out Jorvorskie Lane)
Being an addict
Is no excuse for stealing
Seek McCounseling
~P~

Brangelina (Shout Out Shiloh)
Maybe we should blame
Jennifer for not being
Attractive enough
~P~

Agent Smith
"Humans...a virus"
Like so many, he became
What he despised most.
~J~

Psychomachia
What nobler purpose?
Removing our worst aspects.
Result: Mr. Hyde.
~J~

Genesis 3:1
So much damage wrought
By an enemy bearing
no arms and no legs.
~J~

Wicked Perspective
Crusher of women.
Thief. Fugitive. Murderer.
Behold...Dorothy.
~J~

Beam me up Scotty...twice, please. (with appologies to Mr. Irons)
Transport accident,
Removing our worst aspects.
Result: Wimpy Kirk
~S~

All mixed up, don’t know what to do
One Holden Caufield,
Society was his worst
enemy: himself.
~S~

Vampire Perspective (the book version!) (again, with appologies to Mr. Irons)
Captor of women,
[Thief]. Fugitive. Murderer.
Behold...”Hero” Will Smith.
~S~

This Week We Haiku for Villains—In the Interest of Equal Time

2008-01-30T16:45:00.000-05:00

Banality of Godwin
While we assume that
Villainy is inhumane
Animals don't sin
~P~

Idi Amin
My ex-bff
Thought The Last King of Scotland
Was about James V
~P~

Scar+Shere Khan>>Simba+Mowgli
Disney must want us
To like its villains, since they
Have the best voices
~P~

'Battlefield Earth' is Mitt Romney's Favourite Novel[1]
No one says where the
Enemy in Top Gun is
Supposed to be from
~P~

Villain or Victim?
A wretched creature.
Soul-twisted by the One Ring.
What’s taters, Precious?
~J~

One of the Best You’ve Never Heard Of
John Bly of “Brisco”.
Underrated foe in an
underrated show.
~J~

Why Hannibal Was So Terrifying
None “drove him to it”.
Lecter’s evil was simply
a matter of choice.
~J~

A Galaxy Far, Far Away...
Was Jabba so tough?
Did anyone ever try
pouring salt on him?
~J~

This Week We Haiku for Villains

2008-01-29T20:23:00.000-05:00

Hitler or Magneto
Real or fictional,
They all represent evil.
The dark side of Man.
~S~

Your Turn
It’s a meager start,
But I know you’ll help me out.
Go! Write some haiku
~S~

This or That - جمعھ

2008-01-25T18:15:00.000-05:00

Intellectual Property
Reading the book first
lets me feel superior
when I watch the film.
~J~

To Paraphrase My Mom...
Best to have something
And then not need it, than to
need, but not have it.
~J~

Presidential Parties
There are Democrats,
Republicans, and voters
whose guy never wins.
~J~

DIY Valentine’s Gift
Candy or Flowers?
Think outside the box, people!
Give cookbooks and seeds!
~J~

Ambigu-dextrous
Right or left-handed?
As a kid, I was both. Then
I got my mind “right”.
~J~

To Be or Not To Be
That is the question.
Is it nobler to suffer
the slings and arrows...
~J~

This or That - جمعرات

2008-01-24T20:19:00.000-05:00

Secret Origins
Me: Evolution
Them: Intelligent Design
Wherein lies the truth?
~S~

Belly Talk
I have an Innie,
I figured we all had one!
Some have an Outie...
~S~

Man or Machine
Robot or Human?
I prefer Col. Austin,
Cyborg. Best of both.
~S~

Healthy Choices
Super size it or
medium fries and a coke.
Oh god, so lonely.
~m~

Hot Dog!
Ketchup or mustard:
such condiment decisions
make or break the meal.
~m~

Red Wine in the Afternoon
Choosy moms choose JIF
to make the kids' school lunches.
Whose mom buys Skippy?
~m~

Power to the PC
360's games rule
PS3's Blu-Ray sparkles
The Wii is still fun
~P~

Outlook Grim
Macs are for artists
PCs are for the office
Yet both run Windows?
~P~

Since they All Fall in My Palm I'll Take a Treo
iPhones create stares
BlackBerries produce addicts
Windows Mobile bores
~P~

Beatles or Rolling Stones
You may love them both,
but deep down you like one more.
Just one of those things...
~J~

Smoking or Non-Smoking Section
I may choose smoking.
Although I don’t smoke, often
they have more free seats.
~J~

Primal Needs
When I’ve worked so long
that I must choose food or sleep,
I sleep; dream of food.
~J~

This or That - بده,

2008-01-23T17:19:00.000-05:00

Dog People or Cat people
Dogs spend their hours
Waiting for you to come home.
Cats don't know you've left.
~J~

Paper or Plastic
Either way you’re screwed -
Kill trees or fill a landfill.
Just bring a backpack.
~J~

Encouragers or Haters*
Congratulating?
Are you appreciating?
No? Then you’re hating.
~J~

*Thanks to my niece for that one

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - suk

2008-01-18T19:58:00.000-05:00

Hypoco-friendly
Your precious Prius
Gets its electricity
From coal-burning plants
~P~

Yum! Brands for Your Feet
Converse Chuck Taylors,
Payless Shaqs and Cole Haan are
All [owned] by Nike
~P~

Jose Chung's "From Outer Space"
Aliens are real;
Otherwise pictures of them
Wouldn't look alike
~P~

Wolves? Where?
Hypertrichosis
Means "being really hairy;"
No moon is needed
~P~

Expiration Date
Products always break
ONE DAY after the warranty ends.
The Man strikes again.
~J~

Anti-Retroactive
My new 360
Won’t play my old X-Box games?
Bill Gates needs more cash?!
~J~

Why “Men In Black” Can’t Be True
What I can’t believe,
is that Smith & Jones could just
blend into a crowd.
~J~

Alien DNA Conspiracy?
Me, Air Force Brat. Born:
Wright-Patterson Air Force Base,
Where aliens live!
~S~

Truly Unfortunate
His discomfort grows.
She shifts nervously. Silence...
Viagra’s failed them.
~J~

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - pharuehat

2008-01-17T20:58:00.000-05:00

Off the Rack
Stores like Old Navy
make me pay to wear clothes that
advertise for them.
~J~

Chance Encounter
I met The Man once...
“Why keep screwing me?” I asked.
He said, “And you are...?”
~J~

Animal Cruelty
For the love of God,
Stop torturing the rabbit...
Let him have his Trix.
~J~

Breast Reversal
The same docs who charged
To implant defective breasts
charged to remove them.
~J~

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
Biggie and 2Pac.
Nobody saw nuthin’, right?
Not counting the cops.
~J~

Late Night TV
Ah, infomercials -
Where to begin? How about
with “Bald spot spray paint”?
~J~

The Second Ammendment (circa 1992)
When pogs are outlawed,
only outlaws will have pogs.
"... from my cold, dead hands!"
~m~

Of My i
ipods are shiny
so they scratch easily and,
you buy new ipods.
~m~

Glass Heeling
Men invented heels,
but why do women insist
on so many pairs?
~m~

Requiem for a Meme
So disappointed.
Subservient chicken is
just a viral ad.
~m~

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - phut

2008-01-16T20:11:00.000-05:00

The Button at the Crosswalk
That button’s there
To give us something to do.
It ain’t hooked up, y’all.
~J~

Alternate Street Parking
New York meter maids
Can’t wait for 3-day weekends.
They know you sleep late...
~J~

DST
Daylight Savings Time!
BUNK! I call shenanigans!
Don’t get me started!!
~J~

“Say it Ain’t So, Joe!”
A dual entry;
The White Sox scandal, of course,
and the quote’s a fake.
~J~

Open Letter to the Matrix
Since the world’s a lie,
why not hook a brother up
with that lottery?
~J~

Goes Without Saying
Threat level orange!
Weapons of mass destruction!
Mission Accomplished!
~J~

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - angkhan

2008-01-15T19:17:00.000-05:00

McScam
Drive-thrus hedge their bets -
They take the cash first, and hope
You won't check the bag.
~J~

Red Carpets Cut Red Tape
When “science” and “facts”
won’t help you spread your message...
Go win an Oscar!
~J~

Naughty or Nice
Letters to Santa
Bring less gifts than those to the
Illuminati.
~J~

Moon Landing Hoax
Tranquilty Base,
This one’s for you to haiku.
You know who you are!
~S~

Faith Tells Me
Is it? Could it be?
Religion-Conspiracy.
Some say yes, some no.
~S~

Tabloids Lie
Tupac and Elvis
Aren’t protected witnesses.
They are dead, folks. Dead.
~H~

Crossroads double cross
For Robert Johnson
The quest for fame turned deadly
Faustian bargain
~H~

Twasn’t the man
That felled Marion
But crack and the FBI
“The b**** set me up”
~H~

Have you seen Capricorn One?
Ionizing Radiation
Coronal Mass Ejections
Yo! Van Allen Belts!
~W~

http://www.apple.com/macbookair/
Microsoft may rule
Offices and OSes
But Apple owns cool
~P~

Ourobulimia
In '73:
CBS sold Viacom.
'05? Vice versa.
~P~

Hype is (from) Universal
Kanye and [Curtis]
Battled for the Billboard spot
On the same label
~P~

What “30-day Free Trial” Really Means
“We hope you’ll forget
you signed up for this, then we
can start charging you.”
~J~

General Warning
Alcohol’s not bad,
And neither are cigarettes.
But pot’s a KILLER!
~J~

End of an Era
I was overjoyed
When Netflix killed Blockbuster.
And now for Starbuck’s...
~J~

Lowest Common Denominator
Buns (in packs of six),
And hot dogs (packs of eight), make
shoppers buy in bulk.
~J~

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - Definite

2008-01-15T18:03:00.000-05:00

The Man
Just who is the man?
“How is he defined?” I ask.
I say he’s not me!
~S~

My Definition
We’re all little cogs
In the machine, and The Man
controls the software

Anytime Group A
Enters conflict with Group B,
The Man sells tickets.

Whenever someone
can’t do what they want to do,
The Man set it up.

It’s just like fate, ‘cept
Afterwards someone got paid -
You guessed it: The Man!

He is everyone,
And he’s no one; hangs out with
The “they” from “They say...”
~J~

Kudos
Bravo! Excellent!
The Man would sure be appalled!
You nailed it, dead on.
~S~

Crimen & Punishment - Frigedæg

2008-01-12T03:25:00.000-05:00

Collateral Damage
He huffed, and he puffed,
And he blew their houses in!
No word from FEMA.
~J~

I Swear to Tell the Truth...
“Question, Your Honor -
You think I’m a killer, but
too noble to lie?”
~J~

Violet Crimes
Her gum-chewing ways
Earned her 25 to life;
as a blueberry.
~J~

See My Divest
Being able to
Use the Sherman Act would make
Monopoly fun
~P~

Boast & Toast
Deal: I'll stop snitching
When rappers stop being self-
Incriminating
~P~

John Pickering
The Senate first used
"High crimes and misdemeanors"
For impeaching drunks
~P~

Mann Act Up
Boxer Jack Johnson
Saved saved his wife from a brothel
And went to prison
~P~

Crime & Punishment - Þunresdæg

2008-01-10T15:38:00.000-05:00

What the French, Toast?
These days, a potty mouth
earns British gum, instead of
A mouth full of soap.
~J~

Public Enemies
Malcolm and Martin.
Mandela, [Gandhi], and more.
Rebels with a cause.
~J~

Tainted Love
When I was a boy,
A fair maiden stole my heart -
I got her back, though.
~J~

Crime & Punishment - Wēdnes dæg

2008-01-09T20:48:00.000-05:00

Synonymous Doesn't Mean the Same
To "Invite and House"
does not mean the same as to
"Draw and Quarter"
~J~

Caufield Complex
I feel for Holden,
Caught up in hipocracy.
Alone. Lost. Afraid.
~S~

The Phantom Zone
True “no-frills” prison -
You don’t even get to keep
your third dimension.
~J~

One’s Known for Crime, One’s Known for Punishment
I used to mix up,
IRA and IRS.
Bombing and taxes.
~S~

When Scattergories gets ugly (or Irons family game night)
“Ice Cream Popsicle”
Cold phrase sparked heated debate
Verdict? Brotha, please.
~H~

- Why You Shouldn’t Piss Off the Gods -

Tantalus
Hollow...empty ache...
No concept of “taste”... a dream
long since forgotten.
~J~

Arachne
They weave to this day.
Descendents of she who spun
wool like no other.
~J~

Prometheus
The light of mankind
Purchased with the tortured flesh
Of the last Titan
~J~

Narcissus
Love proved his downfall;
The goddess’ love for him,
And his for himself
~J~

Crime & Punishment - Tiwes dæg

2008-01-08T16:51:00.000-05:00

Clean Getaway
Kids don't realize
that cookie crumbs constitute
damning evidence.
~J~

Smart Trip
Back-doors on the bus
Open, as if begging you:
"Do not pay your fare"
~P~

That's a Real World Challenge
Before GTA
Runing down pedestrians
Was but a pipe dream
~P~

Qatar-Middle East
Your peers detest you
When you never skip classes
But too much means "F"s
~P~

Crime & Punishment

2008-01-07T22:04:00.000-05:00

Universal Language
The silent treatment
is aptly named; since talking
digs you in deeper.
~J~

Fashion Trends
Hip-Hop 101:
Jail time for pimps or dealers
is like the new black.
~J~

Negative Reinforcement
“Time-outs” for my dad
Meant time out of his schedule
To whup my behind.
~J~

Iowa Cockahoop
Underage drinking
Poses less of a threat than
Underage voting
~P~

Yo-ho-ho and A Barrel of BitTorrent
Music "piracy"
Lacks the swashbuckling of its
Nautical namesake
~P~

Timeout N.E.S.
Going to my room
Stopped deterring my mischief
After Nintendo
~P~

I Ledge a Peegance...
In the War on Drugs,
Uncle Sam retreated
from prohibition.
~J~

Wheel in the Sky
If Karma’s a [snitch],
It’s only because we all
keep abusing her.
~J~

Pre-packaged Bliss
Given what’s in it,
letting Timmy have dessert
is worse punishment.
~J~

Bittersweet Victory
Cheat codes aren’t as fun
Now that game developers
want us to find them.
~J~

Revenge… Russian style
Dostoevsky’s tome
On murderous thoughts made real
Inspired this haiku
~H~

Humbled by their honor
The Supreme Court! Lord!
My Black ancestors fought hard
For my right to write.
~H~

Karma
All things in cycles
All energy good and bad
Is returned. Ache.
~H~

Jinx! Buy Me a Coke!
Having uttered words
in unison, I hereby
demand my bounty.
~J~

Video Rental Warning (aka: Behold the Range of Tim Robbins)
“Hudsucker Proxy”,
“Shawshank Redemption”. Do NOT
get these films mixed up.
~J~

Kung Fu Justice
Take your lives and go!
But leave your limbs where they are -
They belong to ME!
~J~

Boundaries, Borders and Bridges – With Epilogue

2008-01-07T16:31:00.000-05:00

Deadline
We scramble like mad,
Because one minute too late
Means it won’t matter
~J~

Flatline
Stress? Diet, maybe?
Her life, others’ lives drift by -
Arm numbs, vision blurs...
~J~

Lifeline
An ocean of light...
They struggle to reel her back
from the other side.
~J~

Headline: $100 Million to the Moon
“Life’s too short!”, she said.
“Near-death Survivor Buys Trip
To See the Heavens”
~J~

Welcome to ‘08!
May all of your syllables
Add up correctly
~J~

Boundaries, Borders, and Bridge - 五

2007-12-21T15:31:00.000-05:00

www.lenlow.com
"Mahna Mahna" plus
Kanye's "Gold Digger" equals
Best mash-up ever
~P~

Golden Parachute
Friends with benefits
Are best utilized by the
Polyamorous
~P~

X-Men
Dating co-workers
Is a crash course in why you
Don't pee where you drink
~P~

X-Mas
With Amazon Prime
I have til Sunday morning
For "last minute" gifts
~P~

Deadline
We scramble like mad,
Because one minute too late
Means it won’t matter
~J~

Flatline
Stress? Diet, maybe?
Her life, others’ lives drift by -
Arm numbs, vision blurs...
~J~

Lifeline
An ocean of light...
They struggle to reel her back
from the other side.
~J~

Boundaries, Borders, and Bridge - 三

2007-12-19T19:35:00.000-05:00

Celery Segregation
Folks who get grossed out
when the foods on their plates touch
make me laugh inside.
~J~

Missing Link
His skills as hunter
greatly improve following
his morning coffee.
~J~

When I Became a Baller
I knew I’d made it
when I paid cash at a place
with real silverware.
~J~

The Glass Ceiling
Although it’s painful,
bumping your head cuts less deep
than when you break through.
~J~

Boundaries, Borders, and Bridges 二

2007-12-18T20:55:00.000-05:00

States of Confusion
Outside the “Mid-South”
No one knows exactly
What the “Mid-South” is.
~J~

At 12:01
How does one describe
“after midnight”? Monday morning
Or Sunday night?
~J~

The Portal
A parallel Earth
stared back at me through the rip.
What a handsome guy!
~J~

the suburbs
its not the same here
its where you don't want to go
wait, it is the same
~c~

speaking of midnight
the hour is near. i'm tired.
more haiku later...
~c~

Games and Entertainment - Parasceve

2007-12-14T16:34:00.000-05:00

Not Really a Game
About once a month,
I get to play “what’s that smell?”
with our fridge. Good times...
~J~

Heat Miser and Friends
Piss-poor quality
and nostalgia duke it out
each year at Christmas.
~J~

Now You See Them? No, You Don’t.
On our Vegas trip,
We saw Penn & Teller live...
Rent the video.
~J~

Balancing Act
When I am inclined*
I’ll juggle or do handstands.

*Read “inclined” as “drunk”
~J~

I’m just curious;
Has anyone tried the one-foot
elevator thing?
~J~

Karaoke
Japanese/English
Meaning "Empty Orchestra"
Or "theater nerd fun"
~P~

Sweet Science
Hockeyfights(dot)com
Shows the league leaders in brawls
Are the Mighty Ducks
~P~

You're The Man Now, Dog
Would Sean Connery
Be proud if he ever saw
YTMND?
~P~

They Didn't Call Him "Little" Mac for Nothin' OR Sweet Science the Second
"Mike Tyson's Punch-Out"
Features a form of boxing
Without weight classes
~P~

Dark Apprentice
With luck, the Wii-mote
will reach it’s full potential
with The Force Unleashed
~J~

No Network Available
Riding the subway
is the only time I play
the games on my phone.
~J~

Cynical Afternoon Lineup
Blind Date • Dating Game •
Newlywed Game • Divorce Court •
Flavor of Love • COPS
~J~

Games and EntertainmenT[hursday]

2007-12-13T18:07:00.000-05:00

Y’Know, for Kids!
A dubious pride
comes with being too good
at hula hooping.
~J~

Netflix Makes it Happen
Well, Shawn, you were right.
My new favorite show
is Supernatural.
~J~

Soviet Blocks
Back in the 90’s,
1 out of 4 teens battled
Tetris Addiction.
~J~

Skeeter Weeter
We made “water guns”
from used plastic squeeze bottles.
Lemon-scented fun.
~J~

Close Encounters of the Rhythm Kind
"Guitar Hero" owes
"PaRappa the Rappa," which
In turn owes "Simon."
~P~

Sims Attitude Disorder
It's depressing to
Do better in the game "Life"
Than in your real life
~P~

Locomotion
We all know the song
Yet its eponymous dance
Is long forgotten
~P~

Starlight Express
Just because you can
Do something on roller skates
Does not mean you *should*
~P~

Six Degrees Later
Shia Lebeouf is
like the new Kevin Bacon -
He’s in everything.
~J~

The Numbers Game
For me, sudoku’s
too much effort to not get
a prize at the end.
~J~

Games and Entertainment

2007-12-10T21:00:00.000-05:00

Scattergories Done Properly
It caused some debate,
But the jury’s in; crickets
are farm animals
~J~

The Addict
“My name’s Jim...” (Hi Jim!)
“I lost everything to high-stakes
Rock/Paper/Scissors.”
~J~

The Bridge to Terabithia
Entertaining? Check.
Saddest little film no child
should ever see? Check.
~J~

Marble Madness
Perchance the game board
for Jewish Checkers is a
big yin-yang symbol.
~J~

Trickier Than it Sounds
After the doors close,
stand on one leg as you ride
the elevator.
~J~

PokeMon
Rock Paper Scissors
With a dash of cock fighting
And big game hunting
~P~

Skip It
The best thing of all?
There's a counter on this ball!
The goal's not to fall.
~P~

Captain N
The creepiest part?
Not the huge, sentient Game Boy.
Mother Brain's lipstick.
~P~

On Wii
Bowling or baseball
With a flick of the wrist
I will get a strike
~P~

Japan Only? No more!
Vitual Console,
How I love thee. Download this:
Alien Soldier
~S~

Virtually Fun
I forgot how hard,
Classic video games are.
Good graphics or not.
~S~

Super Mario Brothers
We’re playing the third.
I dig the t[a]nuki suit,
But I hate the flute.
~S~

Oregon Trail
How can you forget
The very first time you died
Of dysentery?
~P~

20 Sided Die
Icosahedron
Exist only for use in
Dungeons and Dragons
~P~

Faster than that Hog in the Hedges
"There's nothing more cool
"Than being hugged by someone
"You like," Sonic sez.
~P~

Duck Hunt
More than anything
I wanted to shoot the grin
Off that bloody dog
~P~

All Good Things...
When I was younger
it was great! As an adult,
peek-a-boo gets old.
~J~

Masters of the Universe
Katamari Time!
Come for the gravity ball,
stay for the muzak!
~J~

Right Foot Blue
Twister was a hit
‘cuz everyone, everywhere
goes through puberty.
~J~

Cosmic Justice
Mass Effect, people.
Choose-your-own-adventure meets
sci-fi /action game.
~J~

Random Ph[r]i[day]losophy

2007-12-07T14:57:00.000-05:00

Carpe Diem
Sooner or later
time makes worm-food of us all.
The next round’s on me!
~J~

Everything in Moderation
Balance rules all things.
Even balance itself is
balanced by chaos.
~J~

Law of the Jungle
“...therefore, your honor,
‘hakuna matata’ is
a valid defense.”
~J~

?????
Vegetables are like
the accountant cousins of
the fruit family.
~J~

Ecosystem
Go beyond searching:
Blog[ger], map[s], [G]mail, and shop!
Just don't be evil.
~P~

Mt Everest XP SP2
I obsessively
Get upgrades for my OS
Because they are there
~P~

Back that Ash Up
Don't say anything
If you can't say something nice
(Or really funny)
~P~

Random Philosop[T]h[ursda]y

2007-12-06T07:21:00.000-05:00

Not THAT O.J.
In the 70’s
The O’Jays released their hit
song, “The Backstabbers”.
~J~

Name That Tune
When “Alternative”
Becomes the mainstream’s music,
What do you call it?
~J~

Bohemian Confession
Forgive me Karma,
for I have sinned. I guess you
must know that by now...
~J~

Francophilia
All words sound better
When translated into French
Even the word "bleu"
~P~

Slogan's Run
When you think different
And you're playing with power
You can just do it
~P~

Stoicism
Not that I don't care
But if I pretend I don't
I can trick myself
~P~

Hedonism
Greatest Happiness
Maximized for me, by me
Everybody wins!
~P~

Daily Maintenance
The human body
needs 30 minutes of fun
for peak performance.
~J~

Hocus Pocus
Satan’s greatest trick
was convincing the whole world
to fight over God.
~J~

First Date Hell
A praying mantis
not only chooses its mates,
but chewses its mates.
~J~

The Gift that Keeps on Giving
Know what means never
having to say you’re sorry?
Two words: “Time machine”.
~J~

Random Philosophy

2007-12-03T19:07:00.000-05:00

Praise the Stupid
Thank God for morons.
Wouldn't it suck if no one
Were dumber than you?
~J~

It's All in the Accent (May need to be read aloud)
Disrespect women;
You're a playa. In Spanish,
"playa" means "beach". Hmm...
~J~

Infinity
One bean in a pouch
is an infinite amount,
if it’s always there.
~J~

Tastes Like Chicken
Can someone explain
why “Sweet Home Alabama”
is KFC’s theme?
~J~

Pareve on [C]Hannukkah Eve
Allergic to shrimp?
Think bacon is too fatty?
You keep kosher!
~P~

Why I Miss Vegan ~~Parties~~Potlucks
Creative Cuisine
Moral high ground, but mostly:
They made me feel tall
~P~

Amish
The horse keeps drowning
Otherwise they'd water ski
(Plus it's the devil)
~P~

...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Undead Japanese Poetry

2007-12-01T20:41:00.000-05:00

Peanut Gallery
For weeks no haiku,
Mondays dry and humorless.
Inner poet weeps.
~m~

Be a Drupal
Perhaps you should try
Giving us a new topic
Not meta-haiku
~P~

I'll send a topic
if J's not around today
(to not step on toes)
~m~

I imagine that
John will turn off his message
After he gets in
~P~

By the by, do you
Like how I have preserved the
Chronology here?
~P~

P-awe
Time-ordered emails;
guitar hero super skills;
you do not cease to amaze.
~E[dot]S~

P-questions
Man of great talent,
complete with 3-D vision.
But is it Sen or Sir?
~E[dot]S~

Awww, E[dot]S
Sarcasm moves me
We should be "friends" on Facebook
Behind m's's back
~P~

You Can't Spelll GTVO Without TV
To a honor a friend's
Quest to elect Jim Martin
I have changed my name
~P~

That's what she said?
I dig where you're at.
Everything is more fun
done behind m's back.
~E[dot]S~

Edward Cullen Is a Pedophile
Let's pretend I read
This 17 Year-Old's blog
For zombie haiku

Haiku for [T]H[u]er[sday]oes 2.0

2007-11-29T18:31:00.000-05:00

Mr. Goose Egg
‘Til you came along,
we counted on our fingers
and toes. My hero!
~J~

Public Enemy #1
Not sure, but I think
The ‘D’ after Chuck stands for
“Dropping mad knowledge”
~J~

Earth, Wind, and Fire (and Water)
Each death brings new life.
A link in the chain, he is
ancient...and he’s twelve.
~J~

From the Book of Winston
A good rule of thumb:
If someone asks you if you’re
a god...you say “YES!”
~J~

haiku mondays [俳句 月曜日]

A New Year

Christmas and SolsThursday

Christmas and Solsticednesday

Christmas and SolsTuesday

Christmas and Solstice

Song Summar[Tuesda]ys

Song Summaries

Freedursday

FreedoMensday

Freeduesday

Freedom

Thanksgiving ExpereiWednes

Thanksgiving TuExperiences

Thanksgiving Experiences

A Few of My Favorite Things - 3

A Few of My Favorite Things - 2

A Few of My Favorite Things - 1

What are you doing right now? - 3

What are you doing right now? - 2

What are you doing right now? - 1

Helpful Hints / News You Can Use

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 4

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 3

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 2

Sequels, Reruns, and Second Chances - 1

Spring - 2

Spring - 1

More Pet Peeves - 4

More Pet Peeves - 3

More Pet Peeves - 2

More Pet Peeves - 1

As Seen on TV - Mōnandæg

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Aoine

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Déardaoin

Stories, Fables and Fairy Tales - Céadaoin

Men, Women, and Relationships - ♃

Men, Women, and Relationships - ☿

Politics/In the News - THE Mega-Meta-Haiku *Explained*

Politics/In the News - THE Mega-Meta-Haiku

Politics/In the News - منگل

Politics/In the News - پیر

Famous Quotes

Regular Schedules / The Daily Grind

Scary Things - ホワイトデ

Scary Things - Jerdrein

Scary Things - Jecrean

Scary Things - Jemayrt

Scary Things - Jelune

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Aoine

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Déardaoin

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Chéadaoin

In Honor of Radio Raheem - An Mháirt

Awards and Accolades - Dydd Gwener

Awards and Accolades - Dydd Llun

Pretty Pictures - جمعھ

Pretty Pictures - جمعرات

Pretty Pictures - منگل

Lyrics - Iovis

Lyrics - Mercurii

Lyrics - Martis

Lyrics - Lunae

Follow the Bouncing Ball

Haiku for Villains—In the Interest of Equal Time

This Week We Haiku for Villains—In the Interest of Equal Time

This Week We Haiku for Villains

This or That - جمعھ

This or That - جمعرات

This or That - بده,

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - suk

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - pharuehat

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - phut

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - angkhan

Monopolies, Conspiracies, and THE MAN - Definite

Crimen & Punishment - Frigedæg

Crime & Punishment - Þunresdæg

Crime & Punishment - Wēdnes dæg

Crime & Punishment - Tiwes dæg

Crime & Punishment

Boundaries, Borders and Bridges – With Epilogue

haiku mondays [俳句月曜日]

Politics/In the News - THE Mega-Meta-Haiku Explained