Boundaries, Borders, and Bridge - 五

www.lenlow.com
"Mahna Mahna" plus
Kanye's "Gold Digger" equals
Best mash-up ever
~P~

Golden Parachute
Friends with benefits
Are best utilized by the
Polyamorous
~P~

X-Men
Dating co-workers
Is a crash course in why you
Don't pee where you drink
~P~

X-Mas
With Amazon Prime
I have til Sunday morning
For "last minute" gifts
~P~

Deadline
We scramble like mad,
Because one minute too late
Means it won’t matter
~J~

Flatline
Stress? Diet, maybe?
Her life, others’ lives drift by -
Arm numbs, vision blurs...
~J~

Lifeline
An ocean of light...
They struggle to reel her back
from the other side.
~J~

Boundaries, Borders, and Bridge - 三

Celery Segregation
Folks who get grossed out
when the foods on their plates touch
make me laugh inside.
~J~

Missing Link
His skills as hunter
greatly improve following
his morning coffee.
~J~

When I Became a Baller
I knew I’d made it
when I paid cash at a place
with real silverware.
~J~

The Glass Ceiling
Although it’s painful,
bumping your head cuts less deep
than when you break through.
~J~

Boundaries, Borders, and Bridges 二

States of Confusion
Outside the “Mid-South”
No one knows exactly
What the “Mid-South” is.
~J~

At 12:01
How does one describe
“after midnight”? Monday morning
Or Sunday night?
~J~

The Portal
A parallel Earth
stared back at me through the rip.
What a handsome guy!
~J~

the suburbs
its not the same here
its where you don't want to go
wait, it is the same
~c~

speaking of midnight
the hour is near. i'm tired.
more haiku later...
~c~

Games and Entertainment - Parasceve

Not Really a Game
About once a month,
I get to play “what’s that smell?”
with our fridge. Good times...
~J~

Heat Miser and Friends
Piss-poor quality
and nostalgia duke it out
each year at Christmas.
~J~

Now You See Them? No, You Don’t.
On our Vegas trip,
We saw Penn & Teller live...
Rent the video.
~J~

Balancing Act
When I am inclined*
I’ll juggle or do handstands.

*Read “inclined” as “drunk”
~J~

I’m just curious;
Has anyone tried the one-foot
elevator thing?
~J~

Karaoke
Japanese/English
Meaning "Empty Orchestra"
Or "theater nerd fun"
~P~

Sweet Science
Hockeyfights(dot)com
Shows the league leaders in brawls
Are the Mighty Ducks
~P~

You're The Man Now, Dog
Would Sean Connery
Be proud if he ever saw
YTMND?
~P~

They Didn't Call Him "Little" Mac for Nothin' OR Sweet Science the Second
"Mike Tyson's Punch-Out"
Features a form of boxing
Without weight classes
~P~

Dark Apprentice
With luck, the Wii-mote
will reach it’s full potential
with The Force Unleashed
~J~

No Network Available
Riding the subway
is the only time I play
the games on my phone.
~J~

Cynical Afternoon Lineup
Blind Date • Dating Game •
Newlywed Game • Divorce Court •
Flavor of Love • COPS
~J~

Games and EntertainmenT[hursday]

Y’Know, for Kids!
A dubious pride
comes with being too good
at hula hooping.
~J~

Netflix Makes it Happen
Well, Shawn, you were right.
My new favorite show
is Supernatural.
~J~

Soviet Blocks
Back in the 90’s,
1 out of 4 teens battled
Tetris Addiction.
~J~

Skeeter Weeter
We made “water guns”
from used plastic squeeze bottles.
Lemon-scented fun.
~J~

Close Encounters of the Rhythm Kind
"Guitar Hero" owes
"PaRappa the Rappa," which
In turn owes "Simon."
~P~

Sims Attitude Disorder
It's depressing to
Do better in the game "Life"
Than in your real life
~P~

Locomotion
We all know the song
Yet its eponymous dance
Is long forgotten
~P~

Starlight Express
Just because you can
Do something on roller skates
Does not mean you *should*
~P~

Six Degrees Later
Shia Lebeouf is
like the new Kevin Bacon -
He’s in everything.
~J~

The Numbers Game
For me, sudoku’s
too much effort to not get
a prize at the end.
~J~

Games and Entertainment

Scattergories Done Properly
It caused some debate,
But the jury’s in; crickets
are farm animals
~J~

The Addict
“My name’s Jim...” (Hi Jim!)
“I lost everything to high-stakes
Rock/Paper/Scissors.”
~J~

The Bridge to Terabithia
Entertaining? Check.
Saddest little film no child
should ever see? Check.
~J~

Marble Madness
Perchance the game board
for Jewish Checkers is a
big yin-yang symbol.
~J~

Trickier Than it Sounds
After the doors close,
stand on one leg as you ride
the elevator.
~J~

PokeMon
Rock Paper Scissors
With a dash of cock fighting
And big game hunting
~P~

Skip It
The best thing of all?
There's a counter on this ball!
The goal's not to fall.
~P~

Captain N
The creepiest part?
Not the huge, sentient Game Boy.
Mother Brain's lipstick.
~P~

On Wii
Bowling or baseball
With a flick of the wrist
I will get a strike
~P~

Japan Only? No more!
Vitual Console,
How I love thee. Download this:
Alien Soldier
~S~

Virtually Fun
I forgot how hard,
Classic video games are.
Good graphics or not.
~S~

Super Mario Brothers
We’re playing the third.
I dig the t[a]nuki suit,
But I hate the flute.
~S~

Oregon Trail
How can you forget
The very first time you died
Of dysentery?
~P~

20 Sided Die
Icosahedron
Exist only for use in
Dungeons and Dragons
~P~

Faster than that Hog in the Hedges
"There's nothing more cool
"Than being hugged by someone
"You like," Sonic sez.
~P~

Duck Hunt
More than anything
I wanted to shoot the grin
Off that bloody dog
~P~

All Good Things...
When I was younger
it was great! As an adult,
peek-a-boo gets old.
~J~

Masters of the Universe
Katamari Time!
Come for the gravity ball,
stay for the muzak!
~J~

Right Foot Blue
Twister was a hit
‘cuz everyone, everywhere
goes through puberty.
~J~

Cosmic Justice
Mass Effect, people.
Choose-your-own-adventure meets
sci-fi /action game.
~J~

Random Ph[r]i[day]losophy

Carpe Diem
Sooner or later
time makes worm-food of us all.
The next round’s on me!
~J~

Everything in Moderation
Balance rules all things.
Even balance itself is
balanced by chaos.
~J~

Law of the Jungle
“...therefore, your honor,
‘hakuna matata’ is
a valid defense.”
~J~

?????
Vegetables are like
the accountant cousins of
the fruit family.
~J~

Ecosystem
Go beyond searching:
Blog[ger], map[s], [G]mail, and shop!
Just don't be evil.
~P~

Mt Everest XP SP2
I obsessively
Get upgrades for my OS
Because they are there
~P~

Back that Ash Up
Don't say anything
If you can't say something nice
(Or really funny)
~P~

Random Philosop[T]h[ursda]y

Not THAT O.J.
In the 70’s
The O’Jays released their hit
song, “The Backstabbers”.
~J~

Name That Tune
When “Alternative”
Becomes the mainstream’s music,
What do you call it?
~J~

Bohemian Confession
Forgive me Karma,
for I have sinned. I guess you
must know that by now...
~J~

Francophilia
All words sound better
When translated into French
Even the word "bleu"
~P~

Slogan's Run
When you think different
And you're playing with power
You can just do it
~P~

Stoicism
Not that I don't care
But if I pretend I don't
I can trick myself
~P~

Hedonism
Greatest Happiness
Maximized for me, by me
Everybody wins!
~P~

Daily Maintenance
The human body
needs 30 minutes of fun
for peak performance.
~J~

Hocus Pocus
Satan’s greatest trick
was convincing the whole world
to fight over God.
~J~

First Date Hell
A praying mantis
not only chooses its mates,
but chewses its mates.
~J~

The Gift that Keeps on Giving
Know what means never
having to say you’re sorry?
Two words: “Time machine”.
~J~

Random Philosophy

Praise the Stupid
Thank God for morons.
Wouldn't it suck if no one
Were dumber than you?
~J~

It's All in the Accent (May need to be read aloud)
Disrespect women;
You're a playa. In Spanish,
"playa" means "beach". Hmm...
~J~

Infinity
One bean in a pouch
is an infinite amount,
if it’s always there.
~J~

Tastes Like Chicken
Can someone explain
why “Sweet Home Alabama”
is KFC’s theme?
~J~

Pareve on [C]Hannukkah Eve
Allergic to shrimp?
Think bacon is too fatty?
You keep kosher!
~P~

Why I Miss Vegan PartiesPotlucks
Creative Cuisine
Moral high ground, but mostly:
They made me feel tall
~P~

Amish
The horse keeps drowning
Otherwise they'd water ski
(Plus it's the devil)
~P~

...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Undead Japanese Poetry

Peanut Gallery
For weeks no haiku,
Mondays dry and humorless.
Inner poet weeps.
~m~

Be a Drupal
Perhaps you should try
Giving us a new topic
Not meta-haiku
~P~

I'll send a topic
if J's not around today
(to not step on toes)
~m~

I imagine that
John will turn off his message
After he gets in
~P~

By the by, do you
Like how I have preserved the
Chronology here?
~P~

P-awe
Time-ordered emails;
guitar hero super skills;
you do not cease to amaze.
~E[dot]S~

P-questions
Man of great talent,
complete with 3-D vision.
But is it Sen or Sir?
~E[dot]S~

Awww, E[dot]S
Sarcasm moves me
We should be "friends" on Facebook
Behind m's's back
~P~

You Can't Spelll GTVO Without TV
To a honor a friend's
Quest to elect Jim Martin
I have changed my name
~P~

That's what she said?
I dig where you're at.
Everything is more fun
done behind m's back.
~E[dot]S~

Edward Cullen Is a Pedophile
Let's pretend I read
This 17 Year-Old's blog
For zombie haiku